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Before I start whining, let me give you an update on my mother. Her knee replacement surgery went wonderfully, it seems, and she was texting me by the early afternoon. I mean epic, multi-paragraph texts. ( Texts, linkspam, booze, and a poll )ETA: I'm on the phone with Mom now, and she says she sat up in her bed, put in her contacts, put on her makeup, and painted her nails. YOU CAN ONLY HOPE TO CONTAIN HER.  Tags: batman, booze, conversations with my mother, cowboys and aliens, dogs, dolls, health, iron man, let the right one in, lord of the rings, movies, my mother, never let me go, pirates of the caribbean, polls, sam, school, sucker punch, the girl with the dragon tattoo, tonner, tribulations, twilight, twitter, why we can't have nice things, wtf, x-men
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... and so I'm pretty anxious right now, to the point of not really being able to focus or get much done. It's actually a pretty routine surgery--Mama de Cleo is having her entire knee replaced, because there's just no cartilage left. She's been hobbling around bone-on-bone for three or four months now, because she couldn't take off work until this month (and kept insisting that she should wait until November, when things would be less hectic at work, which horrified us all). She's not even 60 yet; it's just that Family de Mama de Cleo has crap knees. She's got a really good surgeon who specializes in knee surgery, and it'll involve her taking six weeks off work to recuperate, but she's a trouper, and she'll do her rehab exercises scrupulously. In fact, when she had a minor knee surgery (other knee) a few years back, we caught her up and mopping the kitchen floor later that afternoon. You cannot keep my mother down; you can only hope to contain her. It's just that... you know. It's surgery. Sometimes, things happen. I've been dreading that aspect of it for weeks now, and even though some stress will be involved in the first two weeks of her being home and not able to do much for herself, most of it will pretty much evaporate as soon as I hear that she's out of it okay. I might hear as early as 8 or 9 am; I might not hear until later in the morning. Who knows. ETA (Tuesday morning): She seems to have come through it all just fine and is Resting Comfortably, as they say in the hospital business.  Tags: health, my mother
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Okay. I have never actually said which school I went to as an undergraduate, but I'm going to tell you that it was Birmingham-Southern, because they are pretty much dead to me now. My friend David on Twitter--well, one of my two friends David on Twitter--mentioned an email that BSC sent out, announcing some grade-A fuckery. I don't think they have my current address, because I didn't get it, or else they somehow sensed that it would make my head explode. But now David's forwarded it to me, so this is all straight from the school's mouth. You can read it here, if you scroll down. Let me rewind a little for you here. Birmingham-Southern is-- was--a wonderful little liberal arts school with great fine and performing arts programs and a really good basketball team. It had a small creative writing program that, when I was there, was trying to get more funding and do the best it could. I was in a couple of different editorial positions on the literary magazine while I was there. And one of the primary reasons I went to this school was because it did not have a football team. I had gone to a high school that was very focused on football, and quite honestly, I wanted to go to a school where someone would give a shit about arts and academics. I'm perfectly happy for people to go to football schools, but that's not where I wanted to go, and there are very few places in Alabama that aren't football schools. This was one of them. WELL NOT ANYMORE, THAT IS. Shortly after I left, Dr. Neal Berte--the school's beloved president of many years--retired. And then this David Pollick person became the new president, and then This David Pollick Person took it upon himself to acquire us a football team and A STADIUM, and if that was someone else's call, tell me, so I can blow them up with the power of my mind instead. And now, NOW, the arts and academics are getting cut. BEHOLD:A total of 29 faculty members were given notice that their positions would be eliminated within the next two years. Many of the faculty members cut today were tenured, but tenured and tenure-track faculty members will be given one-year contracts for the upcoming school year.
Altogether five majors were cut from the college’s offerings. Those majors included accounting, computer science, dance, French and German.
One non-tenured faculty member was cut from the math department and three non-tenured faculty were cut from the English department. One of those, by the way, was a friend of mine. It also looks like one of my favorite professors may get cut next year. For the record, I was a double French/Spanish major, by which I mean FUCK YOU. Seriously, FUCK YOU.Back to the article:The cuts follow the discovery of deep and long-term financial problems at the college. In recent weeks, BSC faculty members have privately expressed frustration with the administration’s lack of transparency. In particular, faculty and staff were upset that when they had voiced concerns earlier in the fiscal year, they had been falsely assured the college’s financial condition was in good standing.
For the last several years, BSC has undertaken a series of expensive capital projects, including new dormitories, athletic fields and a welcome center. Few, if any, members of the campus community realized that the college was hemorrhaging cash at the same time these projects were underway. I just--I would like to continue ranting and quoting fuckwittery at you, but I have a migraine now. I just. I can't. What. This school was a rescue for people, people who didn't fit in at schools that are all about sports (which, around here, is most of them). This school was a place to prove to people that there was, in fact, room in the world for them. And now that place is being taken away. Because God knows we don't have ENOUGH FOOTBALL TEAMS IN ALABAMA.
As a final note, please enjoy the BSC President David Pollick Must Go Facebook group.  Tags: asshaberdashery, rants, school, why we can't have nice things
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In fact, I saw it twice. And I tried to hold off on a discussion entry as long as I could. Because--here's the thing. There really isn't a ~MIND-BLOWING TWIST~ that shows up halfway through or anything. There's no one thing I can really tell you, like with The Sixth Sense or The Matrix, that would just spoil the entire concept of the movie. Which is why it's so much more rewarding to go in and let the movie unfold itself for you. Not because there's any one big thing that's supposed to CHANGE THE WORLD, but because spoiling yourself would rob you of a hundred little moments of "Holy shit, that was badass." You know. Like with a lot of really good movies. It's probably the best movie I've seen this year, but... that's not a real tall hurdle to clear, to be honest with you. Like, the second best was probably Shutter Island, and the third best, unless I saw something better and I'm just not remembering it, was probably... Eclipse. Yeah. It's been that bad. (Wait, no--I technically saw Sherlock Holmes on January 1st. There you are.) So. ( SPOILERS )ETA: I should add: the discussion above sounds confusing because I'm leaving a lot of stuff out. It sounds more cryptic than it is. In fact, I thought Inception was remarkably straightfoward, considering, and this is in large part due to really good editing, I think. I had no problem following it on a first viewing, aside from that one point that got discussed on Twitter, and it's a lot more accessible than it sounds.  Tags: inception, movie discussion, movies, philosophical ramblings, you're high aren't you?
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Okay, we have a lot to talk about. First of all, I have a question, since I do talk about mental health and the treatment thereof pretty openly: have any of y'all had any problems with Zoloft withdrawal? I'm moving from a fairly low dose to an even lower one, and I'll probably stop taking it entirely after my next med check. (This is my doctor's idea, and I am on board with it; I am very vocal when something does not work for me, so it's a whole process, and it's professionally guided.) I just want to know if there's something I should look out for. Because we tried to increase it a couple of years ago, before eventually moving to Lamictal (which, after a bumpy adjustment period, has worked out really well), the Zoloft increase was... bad. It was bad. So I want to know what to look out for, so I can recognize it and go back and say "This isn't working" if I have to. (ETA: It may affect your answer to know that I'm going to try to taper entirely off Zoloft after twelve years of being on it.) Second: I have been sick the last two or three days. Not too badly, but a low fever, some sinus drainage, a sore throat, and I've had a cough for a while. So I've been dozing on the couch a lot. I would hate to think that I am such a ~delicate blossom~ that the anxiety of posting a new Fifteen Minutes--let's face it, I only do this 2-3 times a year, so there's kind of a psychological build-up to it--did me in, or smacked my immune system upside the head, or what. But it's possible. I'm usually a bit done in for a day or two after these things, after all. Because I am, apparently, a fragile little e-flower. Who knows. Third: Let's have some linkspam. ( Read more... )Meanwhile--bear with me, I'm going somewhere with this-- this is my new favorite thing. Yes, it's actually a "mystical eye" design. And there is a reason I am showing you this, because: ( Read more... )Meanwhile-meanwhile, YA Highway has linked to me a couple of times this month-- -first to the "Twilight and the female gaze" entry, now to Eclipse in Fifteen Minutes--which is nice. What I saw while I was over there was... not so nice. ( YOU GAVE YOUR BABY A PUNNY TWILIGHT TRAMP STAMP? )I'm going to go lie down again.  Tags: avengers, dark shadows, green lantern, health, jewelry, king arthur, medication, mental health, picspam, rants, sick, sparkle motion, twilight, vampires, where is your god now, why god why, why we can't have nice things, wtf, x-men
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As mentioned earlier: Eclipse in Fifteen Minutes went up a few hours ago. And now: the new Eclipse-themed Made of Fail podcast that I'm on. (There is some very strong language here and there, so be warned.) At pretty much exactly 20 minutes in, we realize that KC has no idea what happens in Breaking Dawn. At 20:34, you can actually hear me rubbing my hands together in a brisk burst of evil. The next 16 minutes are a full game of Horrify the Twilight Noob: Breaking Dawn Edition recorded for posterity, underscored by unusually maniacal laughter from my general direction. We get to The Birth Scene (and, more to the point, What Happens Afterward. "Oh, don't worry, Jacob will look out for the children--" "No no no! No! No! Don't you dare! DON'T YOU DARE! I have to tell this, I have to tell this! Because this is my favorite game") and KC has the most incredibly epic reaction. I start laughing, first really loudly, and then so hard that sound stops coming out of my mouth. (God, I have such a weird laugh.) If you have ever wanted to hear a full explanation of what happens in that last book, this is your chance. Also discussed: Kevin's thoughts on Airbender (I hadn't seen it at that point), the saga of Edward Cat, a sustained meltdown from Dayna, and later, a jewelry-nerd rage spasm from me ("That makes me so! angry! ANGRY!!") around 1:28:30. Apparently I was in fine, or at least somewhat manic, form for this episode. Meanwhile: in case you are wondering why it takes so long to write Fifteen Minutes things nowadays, it might help to see what my process is like. ( I THINK IT IS TIME FOR A DAIQUIRI IN A BAG ) And now, to bed. I have a feeling I will sleep very well tonight.  Tags: drinkage, jewelry, m15m, made of fail, podcast, sparkle motion, twilight, twitter, we do not speak of it, writing Current Mood: mellow
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Sweet baby Jesus, that was a terrible movie. We went to see it because my mother loves natural-disaster-type effects. Like, 2012 was basically her catnip. So she sees commercials with all this water and fire flying around and she is like, YES. THIS IS THE MOVIE FOR ME. ( Okay, Mom, give the people a verdict. Two sentences: what did you think? )ETA: A clip from the movie that I think you need to see. Because you will understand everything once you do. Bad acting, bad writing, earthbender dance squad. And yes, watch it all the way through.  Tags: conversations with my mother, movie discussion, movies, my mother, the last airbender
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So, a few things--mostly Twilight-related, now that I think about it. Sorry in advance for that. I'm still working on the Eclipse thing (eh, we can speak of it. We've all known for months, if not since November 2008, that I would be doing it). For some reason, I pretty much had a mild nervous breakdown trying to do the New Moon one, and for some reason... I really don't give a shit this time around, and I mean that in the nicest way possible. Maybe because I feel like New Moon turned out really well and I'm just not even bothering to worry that I could top that; maybe because it's summer and it's hot and life is too short. I "wrote" a few scenes in my head--I do that--but didn't even type anything out until I saw the movie a second time. And today I was just sitting there, trying to figure out what to do--I get to this point where it's like, I can do parody dialogue, but when you get to the text descriptions you need to move from point A to point B, that's when I start rocking in the corner. Those are the bits that take me the longest to make work. So, you know what, I thought? Fuck it. I'ma write in more Viking saga any time I get stuck. I'm going to have people walking in off the street, as it were--people who only hear about the Fifteen Minutes stuff and don't read my regular journal--who are probably going to be confused or dismissive, but there you are. At least it's something new to play with. So what I'm telling you here is that Not Giving a Shit is turning out to be a very positive experience, and I'm back to having fun with it. Anyway. There's a great thread on the Edward Cat entry where people are sharing pictures of their own cats (and a few dogs). Also, speaking of Edward Cat: it has been pointed out to me that if snowcoma woke up to find him in her lap, that means... he was watching her sleep. Just like an Edward should. Bless. ( Read more... )Speaking of cats! Eclipse with lolcats is up! (The Twilight one is where my icon comes from.) I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS. Also, someone sent me a comic about Twilight a long while back, and I didn't bookmark it and can't find it now. I hate to give away the punchline, but I'll have to, in order for anyone to know what I'm talking about. It was: "I thought she meant anal." So... yeah. ETA: Ah! Here we are.Also-also: This trailer chagrins me. But then, I want the Epic Movie people shot into the sun anyway, so.  Tags: comics, edward cat, m15m, movies, sparkle motion, twilight, we do not speak of it, where is your god now
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Okay, so. I saw Eclipse again, because my mother wanted to see it (as she always does), and because this time I could take notes on the scene order (We Do Not Speak Of It). And I feel like I'm a little different from a lot of people in that I can compartmentalize a lot of things. A lot of people--in this case, Twilight fans--will start out liking, say, Edward, for whatever reason, and because they like him, proceed to defend and rationalize everything he does from then on. I'm the kind of person who will take each thing--and this goes for real life as well--and judge it individually. "Saving her from a speeding van, okay, yeah, that's great, that superhero shit, everyone loves that; okay, this cold-shoulder I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT stuff, he's being a dick but I see why, in terms of narrative arc, it's happening; saving her from a roving gang of attackers, that's kind of hilariously contrived, but more superhero shit, Vampire Volvo of Great Justice, rock AH GOD SNEAKING INTO HER ROOM TO WATCH HER SLEEP WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU OH MY FUCK NO." I take it as it comes, and I critique it as it comes. And I think this is why people who like Twilight have been known to hang out here and not hate me, and yet, why people who hate it haven't felt the need to stage an intervention yet. I also think that people's reactions to various points in the series--not just the ~*saga*~ as a whole, but specific elements--says a lot about them individually. A sparkly Rorschach test, if you will. And I think it's interesting to talk about these points, because it may help critics understand why the series resonates so strongly with people. I'm just very lucky in that I can pick out specific elements ("Alice is AWESOME") and leave the rest by the side of the road, no harm done. So, because I think it says a lot about me, I will tell you which scene in Eclipse I had the strongest reaction to, and it is: ( Read more... )  Tags: best of, i can't believe i just did this, it's not that deep, movie discussions, movies, philosophical ramblings, sparkle motion, true blood, twilight, we do not speak of it, you're high aren't you?
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--from snowcoma: So, after having a minor breakdown in the store, and relentlessly calling the foster mom, I got ahold of her, got everything settled, and got the official all clear. She seemed very apologetic for the difficulties. Now, I am going to pick Edward up in the next few hours, and I will not have an internet connection. I DO have a paid account, however, so for better or worse, I will leave a voicepost containing the news of Edward. PRAYER CIRCLE, Y'ALL.  Tags: edward cat Current Mood: hopeful
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So I get a tearful message from snowcoma this morning: There has been yet another snag in getting Edward. I went to the store today with my carrier, his new collar and toy, and....waited. And waited. When they finally got his foster mom on the phone she had YET MORE questions she wanted to talk with my mom about (despite discussing the same things with me the night before and giving me the all-clear). As of ten o'clock this night, my mother hasn't heard from her.
Did I mention we are leaving for Vancouver, WA [this] morning to SEE my mother? And that I am supposed to have a cat for her?
[ snowcoma talks a little bit about panic and anxiety attacks here, which are something I can sadly identify with.] Add in the fact that I am now attached to an animal that someone is playing paperwork keep-away with, and well...
All I want to do is get the damn cat and visit my mother. I ended up crying in the middle of the pet store (and the employees were extremely nice, this is just out of their control). One of them even offered to let me pick him up before the store even opens if I can get the all clear.
You can share any or all of this, because this is goddamn ridiculous. And I feel like I'm letting a lot of people down every time I fail to bring him home. I'm sitting here with an empty collar in my hands and trying not to cry. WHAT THE SHIT. I am pretty sure that an angry mob is not going to convince a foster family that someone is more suitable for cat ownership. I am also pretty sure that catnapping is illegal. I just don't know what to do. Keep in mind that Edward Cat isn't even at the foster family's house, as I understand it--he's all alone at the pet store----while the foster family is somewhere on the phone all like NO CAT FOR YOU. I am not understanding what the problem is here. ETA: Okay, we have figured out that Edward Cat comes from a private/volunteer rescue, not the Humane Society, and a deeply-attached foster family really may have the final say. (And now you know why he's been in that window forever.) My problem with this is that snowcoma was cleared to take Edward home at least once, and they keep giving her this runaround of "We'll have to talk to you/her/someone else, we'll call later" and then it takes days. If you don't want her to have the cat, don't tell her she can have the cat.ETA: HOPEFUL UPDATE  Tags: edward cat Current Mood: ANGRY
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I feel compelled to tell you a few things: We have a new official reboot-from-the-beginning Spider-Man, and apparently he is an incredibly talented English actor who is... 27 years old. Behold: First Pictures of Andrew Garfield at the Spider-Man Press Announcement; How Old Will Andrew Garfield Be When the Next Spider-Man 3 Comes Out? Meanwhile, swsa found this picture of Andrew Garfield with Robert Pattinson and--who is that? When in doubt, Tom Sturridge? Let me tell you, people, I think RPattz has finally been out-haired. And he looks like he knows it, too, in a smug "Yeah, you have fun being The Guy With The Hair now, hope you enjoy having it pulled out by the fistful" way. I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT IS ON THAT KID'S HEAD. Animal, mineral, vegetable? Whatever it is, it is full of secrets.( MOAR LINKSPAM )More importantly, EDWARD CULLEN CAT-- --HAS A HOME. THIS IS THE DANCE WE DANCE WHEN WE DANCE FOR RESCUED CATS. He hasn't been to it yet, but snowcoma has been visiting him at the pet store and is finalizing the adoption process. A process I find a bit amazing, by the way, given that you could have gotten in and out of the store in ten minutes or less if you bought a cat off the shelf (uh. As it were). She says that Edward Cat is incredibly sweet, and that her mother is really looking forward to having him. And that she will take PICTURES for us. I cannot wait for happycat pictures, let me tell you.  Tags: edward cat, let the right one in, pirates of the caribbean, spider-man, the invention of hugo cabret, the last airbender, twilight, vampires, x-men
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YOU GUYS! I LIVED! We got there early enough to get exactly the seats we wanted, and it was comfortably full. (Keep in mind that it was a 5:45 pm.) I didn't see anyone really out-there, just some really young girls and an intermittently crying baby. I will say, the theater was pleasantly cool when we walked in, but about a third of the way through, my glasses steamed up. And they stayed that way. A roomful of 200 het-up women literally steamed up my glasses. Literally, in the literal sense of literally. I could hardly see the movie. I spent an hour pulling them down and pushing them back up, hoping that would help. So. Anyway. I have to give Eclipse a lot of credit, because: ( ~*major sparkly spoilers*~ )P.S. THIS IS A THING THAT REALLY HAPPENED: Elena Kagan Grilled on Critical Judicial Matter of Edward vs. Jacob.  Tags: movie discussion, movies, sparkle motion, twilight, we do not speak of it
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...my blogger gave to me: seven mobs a-mobbing! So. I was having a mild panic attack earlier, but I think I've pulled myself together now. These are really a pretty recent thing; I don't even know. I will say that our fridge has died, our grill has died, and this morning, there was a carjacking in my old (but still pretty near) neighborhood. The slats fell out of my bed, three pairs of jeans spontaneously died (two of them sprang holes of varying sizes in the left knee--which is weird, that they both did. Denim sabotage?--and the third's zipper just came out, like, overnight and I didn't even do anything to it, I don't even KNOW), and I have no idea what I'm going to wear this evening when we go to the movie. It's like, I don't want to end up in freakin' black dress pants and a v-neck t-shirt, but so help me God, I will if I have to. And let's face it: none of these girls are going to be looking at me.
However, the third of the three articles I was interviewed for is up: Living (make that undead) dolls. Because on the Venn diagram of "Talks too much about Twilight on the internet" and "Is a stan for Tonner dolls," there is only one overlap. *hangs head* (Notice, however, the reason given for my pseudonym, which, in context, is kind of hilarious.) (I will however, clarify that I did not buy the Prom Bella. I bought the outfit, secondhand and on the cheap. Because the leg cast is, in fact, hilarious.) Meanwhile, Eclipse is, predictably, wreaking havoc. ( there was almost a riot. i was scared )(Also, today I'm posting a few of my favorite Twilight things--like comics panels and macros--on Tumblr (scroll down). The queue will probably be autoposting long into the night. Also-also! Edward Cullen Cat's adoption is slowly finalizing, it looks like! He may have a home by the end of the week!) By contrast, there's... The Last Airbender. For starters, there's an ICE-COLD HALF-STAR BURN from Roger Ebert. Meanwhile, the movie has risen from zero to an impressive six percent on Rotten Tomatoes (the pull quotes are delightful). The interesting thing about Ebert's review is that his primary problems with the movie don't even involve the racial controversy (although he linked on his Twitter to a "devastating" blog entry about that); to hear him tell it, the movie isn't even competent filmmaking.@ebertchicago: Frustrated by Airbender's lousy 3D, Peter Sobczynski took off his glasses & guesses roughly 2/3 of the footage was in 2D! And yet, my mother still wants to see it. Really, really bad. So we're going on Sunday, I think. I really, really doubt I can take two Things Of Which We Do Not Speak at once (Dayna, DON'T EVEN SAY IT), so I promise nothing. I think we are recording a new Made of Fail on Saturday, though.  Tags: dolls, interviews, movies, sparkle motion, the last airbender, tonner, twilight, we do not speak of it
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... my blogger gave to me: IIIIIIIII'M NOT A FAAAAAAAN. MSNBC: Why doesn’t ‘Twilight’ have a Team Bella?And there I am, front and center--described as "Cleolinda Jones, a 31-year-old 'Twilight' fan from Birmingham, Ala," in a turn of phrase that elicited great chagrin on Twitter. ( What does it mean to be a fan? )Meanwhile, Roger Ebert posted on Twitter that both Variety and the Hollywood Reporter have given Eclipse good--good!--reviews. (And you know they're sincerely good reviews because both sites actually take the time to snark on the rest of the series.) And then, you have to take into account this interview with director David Slade, wherein his approach to the movie seems to boil down to "BE VAMPIRES, GODDAMMIT!" You guys? I think... I think he's made it... awesome.Unfortunately, this is going to make my job very, very hard. That's okay. I try not to post these things until at least the Monday after a movie comes out, because of the joyous "Now I don't have to see the movie!" comments I get. (Not that I could ever take away a significant amount of business from any film, but I'd like to cover my ass, and the first weekend seems to be the most important.) And if I go see it on Wednesday (the Lovely Emily and I are developing plans to this effect) (tickets acquired! Sparkle help us all), I'll have a good four days before I could even post it if I wanted to. Granted, writing the Twilight 15Ms seems to involve a ten-day tailspin, on average, but what I'm saying is, I'll have a good four days' head start on the meltdown. We have a little movement on the Edward Cullen Cat situation-- ( This is the fur of a killer )  Tags: edward cat, interviews, m15m, sparkle motion, sparklemas, twilight, twitter, we do not speak of it
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...my blogger gave to me: two feline chagrins and an article written by the AP. With my "team" preference, as promised. Team Edward vs. Team Jacob: Which side are you on?Christy did tell me that the article was edited for space--although she did insist on keeping my team preference in, because I told her y'all were looking forward to that--so my thoughts on Jacob were cut short ( Read more... )Meanwhile, Edward Cullen Cat is losing his will to dazzle: ( omg pictures ) OMG BREAKING NEWS: In case you didn't see the link buried in a paragraph above, our long international nightmare is over: PETER JACKSON WILL DIRECT THE HOBBIT.  Tags: edward cat, interviews, lord of the rings, philosophical ramblings, picspam, sparkle motion, twilight
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