Occupation: Girl - A movie I haven't seen in five seconds, if you will

01:45 pm September 5th, 2004




			Occupation: Girl - A movie I haven't seen in five seconds, if you will Please close the door and switch on the fun without fail.

cleolinda


	A movie I haven't seen in five seconds, if you will
	I just got a call from Sister Girl. Sister Girl has a bad habit of calling me from the movie theater--I hope to God she's not actually in the room with the movie playing, because I would have to shoot her on principle at that point--and asking me what the end of the movie is. (I know! Seriously!) So now she's out at Wicker Park, and she's all like, AHHHH, HOW DOES IT END?? And I'm like, look, I don't know! (I even kinda wanted to see the movie, and you didn't even ask me to go, hor!) I'd been looking up movie spoilers myself and couldn't find one for Wicker Park at all. As far as I know, the plot of the movie is that Helen of Troy is going out with Josh Hartnett and they're all happy until one day she's like, "Shit, you're not Paris!" and he's like, "Wow, blondes really are dumb," and she dumps him because, you know, she's Helen of Troy, she doesn't have to put up with that shit, and he's all broken up about it, and meanwhile Briseis is all up on his jock and he wakes up one day/night/afternoon/twilight/whatever and she's sitting over him like a freakin' vulture watching him and he's all like, "What are you DOING?" and she's all like, "I'm watching you sleep," and Josh Hartnett's like "OMG YOU ARE WRONG IN THE HEAD" and Matthew Lillard's like "Ruh-roh!" and everyone else is like, "Dude, Shaggy's all up in this?" and then Briseis probably kills everyone. I mean, I don't know. I'm just guessing. Tags: best of, movies

41 comments or Leave a comment


	Comments

	From: cantinera	Date: September 5th, 2004 11:48 am (UTC)		(Link)

Dude, that was all I needed to know. I don't have to see this movie now.

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	From: snowking	Date: September 5th, 2004 11:53 am (UTC)		(Link)

My brother pulls that kind of shit all the time. I am not going to tell anyone how something they're currently watching ends! And then he gets pissy when I don't tell him.

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	From: claddagh812	Date: September 5th, 2004 12:04 pm (UTC)		(Link)

*rotfl* Thanks so much for this entry. It gave me the laugh I've been needing all day.

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	From: gypsytemptress	Date: September 5th, 2004 12:05 pm (UTC)		(Link)

LOL
that made today all the worthwhile

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	From: etherealshores	Date: September 5th, 2004 12:06 pm (UTC)		(Link)

HAHAHAHAHA.

I'm laughing so hard at your plot guess.

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From: rapunze11e	Date: September 5th, 2004 12:06 pm (UTC)		(Link)

A Movie in a Minute.

Cool.

:D

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	From: _nymphette_	Date: September 5th, 2004 12:11 pm (UTC)		(Link)

"...and Josh Hartnett's like "OMG YOU ARE WRONG IN THE HEAD" and Matthew Lillard's like "Ruh-roh!" and everyone else is like, "Dude, Shaggy's all up in this?"

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

*dies*

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	From: la_sonnambula	Date: September 5th, 2004 12:16 pm (UTC)		(Link)

I totally thought Wicker Park is a frou-frou Merchant Ivory bonnet period movie. That, or a movie about the wacky adventures people have in Pier 1 stores.

Heathen of TWoP did a funny piece on Byrne and Kruger's unfortunate apparel at a premier.

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	From: theonlykow	Date: September 5th, 2004 12:20 pm (UTC)		(Link)

Mmm, Frau Frau.

No, wait...

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	From: cleolinda	Date: September 5th, 2004 12:22 pm (UTC)		(Link)

Oh, man, I saw that--I LOVE that blog. Diane Kruger's pretty, I guess, but I love Rose Byrne, and it's a damn shame it doesn't look like she can dress herself. I mean, what IS that?

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	From: yuki_onna	Date: September 5th, 2004 12:22 pm (UTC)		(Link)

Gotta say...the caption to that icon is so:

"Whatchoo talkin' bout, Frodo?"

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	From: kayu	Date: September 5th, 2004 01:04 pm (UTC)		(Link)

bahahahahaha!

hilarious XD

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	From: soberloki	Date: September 5th, 2004 04:34 pm (UTC)		(Link)

Brilliant! XD

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	From: _nymphette_	Date: September 5th, 2004 06:32 pm (UTC)		(Link)

I will never see that icon again, and not think of that line...

But it MUST be, "Whatchoo talkin' 'bout, Fro'yo?"

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	From: fanofall	Date: September 5th, 2004 12:47 pm (UTC)		(Link)

This should totally be the chaser to your book (or something like it). Just a little bit at the end, there. :-D

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	From: heinous_bitca	Date: September 5th, 2004 12:53 pm (UTC)		(Link)

Bwahahahahahhaa! *dead*

Just read your entry to the husband, and we both laughed ourselves silly.

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	From: stargatejunkie	Date: September 5th, 2004 12:55 pm (UTC)		(Link)

OMG... rotflmao... that is great!! I applaud you. :D

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	From: bibliotech	Date: September 5th, 2004 01:26 pm (UTC)		(Link)

*chokes, wheezes, and other non-flattering things*

Well, I'll take that one of my "To-see" list. I think I live near Wicker Park, so I was all, "Feh."

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	From: almostnever	Date: September 5th, 2004 01:33 pm (UTC)		(Link)

esorlehcar reviewed Wicker Park. It begins: "Oh, my god, does Wicker Park suck." And she's a Josh Hartnett fan. So...

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	From: cleolinda	Date: September 5th, 2004 01:58 pm (UTC)		(Link)

Heeeeee. My sister just got back from the movie, and she *still* can't explain what happened.

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	From: mirandaflynn	Date: September 5th, 2004 02:05 pm (UTC)		(Link)

Now you have a theme for your next book! I would totally buy "Movies In a Minute"

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From: notyetxbroken	Date: September 5th, 2004 02:08 pm (UTC)		(Link)

lmfao! thank you, that made me laugh.

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	From: arayuldaiel	Date: September 5th, 2004 02:17 pm (UTC)		(Link)

*gigglesnort* Bwah, you just made my day five times happier :)

BTW, are you going to see Vanity Fair? Me and my friends are thinking of seeing it. (after we go see PoA at the $1 theatre for the 100th time)

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	From: arayuldaiel	Date: September 5th, 2004 04:21 pm (UTC)		(Link)

Sppt, the Fametracker thread has some semi-spoilers for Wicker Park, if you're still looking.

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	From: canonball13	Date: September 5th, 2004 08:55 pm (UTC)		(Link)

You can see PoA for $1??? Where????

I can see it at IMAX for $11. I've seen it 7x so far.

Lucky you.

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	From: arayuldaiel	Date: September 6th, 2004 09:35 am (UTC)		(Link)

You're the lucky one. The closest IMAX to me is an hour and a half away.

The theatre that's showing it is a little mom and pop theatre that shows movies that are done showing at the big movie chains...always smells like ciggartte smoke in there, but still, $1 movies. Sweet.

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	From: modpixie	Date: September 5th, 2004 02:59 pm (UTC)		(Link)

a friend of mine has this theory that matthew lillard is the new brad dourif. i would believe this if lillard had greater range and could do things other than cheesy horror movies. (and no, slc punk! is no wise blood).

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	From: lissybrand	Date: September 5th, 2004 03:52 pm (UTC)		(Link)

lmao - that definetly made me laugh - you are so talented. im so impressed

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	From: christigilly	Date: September 5th, 2004 04:35 pm (UTC)		(Link)
	Totally Off-Topic

I just watched "Ella Enchanted" and, being a sucker for Anne Hathaway movies (having first seen "The Princess Diaries" with my mom), I was wondering if you could make a "Heroine Addict" Icon with her on it (from any of her movies). Pretty please? : O)

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	From: cleolinda	Date: September 5th, 2004 08:09 pm (UTC)		(Link)
	Re: Totally Off-Topic

Ooo, I'll have to do some. Remind me if I don't have them up by--let's say Wednesday.

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	From: theatre_angel	Date: September 5th, 2004 05:24 pm (UTC)		(Link)

::dies::

May I please have your permission to re-post that Wicker Park summary (with credit to you) in my own journal, although it was somewhat off the actual part? Because really. I can barely breathe now, I am laughing so hard.

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	From: cleolinda	Date: September 5th, 2004 08:08 pm (UTC)		(Link)

Oh... sure, why not? Just do the little "

cleolinda" thing and it ought to be fine.

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	From: kudzita	Date: September 5th, 2004 05:59 pm (UTC)		(Link)

...Why, oh why, if Troy had to be made, couldn't you have done the screenplay? *weeps*

OMG so funny.

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	From: dinorider	Date: September 5th, 2004 07:37 pm (UTC)		(Link)
	You're terrific!

Hi Cleo! I just added you to my list of friends 'cause I´m fond of you. I am your peruvian fan.

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	From: yarha	Date: September 5th, 2004 07:58 pm (UTC)		(Link)

Geez. There's gotta be a psychological term for somebody who's unable to watch a film without knowing the ending. Dramaphobe: afraid of drama, esp. as in 'can't stand to not know the end of something'? IGOTTAKNOWRIGHTNOWitis? Dunno.

I admit to having a mild case of this, especially with respect to novels that take too long to develop.

Yarha, End First, then Beginning

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	From: canonball13	Date: September 5th, 2004 08:52 pm (UTC)		(Link)

Thank you so much for making me laugh. I don't even know who the two girls are, but your take on it is funny regardless.

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	From: notthequiettype	Date: September 5th, 2004 11:29 pm (UTC)		(Link)

Everything you write makes me laugh hysterically and wake up my roommate at odd hours. You are officially my hero and what I aspire to be someday. :o)

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	From: edda	Date: September 6th, 2004 12:05 am (UTC)		(Link)

When I saw the preview to that one I thought, "I liked that movie better when it was called Single White Female."

Which itself sucked, but I digress.

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	From: foresthouse	Date: September 6th, 2004 08:02 am (UTC)		(Link)

Why is it there are always people who must do this? I have a friend who consistently calls me right as he is about to go into the movie. Gahhhh!

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	From: jai_eu_froid	Date: September 6th, 2004 10:17 am (UTC)		(Link)

whenever you talk about your sister I think

"THAT'S NOT THE KIND OF MIDOL I WANT!"

i found that hilarious

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	From: lorien__	Date: September 6th, 2004 11:37 am (UTC)		(Link)
	Bane Of Hollywood

I think hollywood should be greatful you're not a movie critic cause omg you would kill'em all.

They would worship you for a good review :p rofl

Couldn't stop laughing.
that movie is no where near of being released here and yet i KNOW i don't wanna see it. (thanks for that)
and what's with the actors all appearing the the same movies??? aren't there enough of them around they have to go back to the same people????
oh well *stops ranting*
Lorien__

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