Occupation: Girl

Please close the door and switch on the fun without fail.

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omg I can't stop laughing
galadriel doll
cleolinda
ZOMG THERE'S A BELLA FIGURE NOW! AND HER EDWARD HAS SUNGLASSES!




(Zombie Edward sold separately.)

"So what you're saying is, we're now dealing with two completely different Edward Dollens."

Three, actually.

"Which one are you going to paint sparkle?"

"I think it should be the one with the sunglasses. I mean, he would be outside, after all."

"HE SHOULD STAY THERE, TOO!"

ANNA, BEHAVE!

Look, guys, I don't even know that I'm going to get both of them. We have to prioritize here, and I'm having a hard time deciding--hit me with some thoughts.

"I really don't know which one... I mean, he's got the sunglasses, which are awesome and you wanted to get some for the other one anyway, but the sunglasses don't come off, but this one does have superior Hair, and... do we have to decide now?"

"Get Faramir, see what he thinks!"

Faramir Two is getting on with everyone like a house afire--he can talk braids with the girls and swords with the boys. Faramir One sleeps in his box at night, curled up inside my headphones listening to various versions of "Wicked Game."

"Well, clearly this one's less of a shambling horror, but, like you said, his sunglasses don't come off, and the eyes being the window to the soul and all..."

"HE HAS NO SOUL!"

"HE DOES TOO! PROBABLY! HE'S VERY SENSITIVE ABOUT THAT!"

Don't forget that there's the issue of Bella. You can't get this one unless you get the Bella.

"She's what, seven inches tall? ... I could take her."

Faramir Two looks over warily at his--brother? twin? self?--huddled up in his box reading The Two Towers. I somehow have about five different copies of the Lord of the Rings books, so I lent the smallest paperbacks to Faramir One. I think he's trying to figure out how things are supposed to work out. Of course, Tolkien didn't really pay a lot of attention to the details of romance; Faramir One was trying to get some advice from Fugagorn, who just pointed out (rather bitterly) that he had to read appendices to figure out what Purple Arwen's deal was, and now she's off with Helm's Deep Aragorn.

("It's cool, though. White Arwen's a lot more chill anyway.")

Anyway, Faramir Two's promised to help Faramir One with the whole Eowyn situation since he (Two) gets along with her so well. "You don't really want either of them, though, do you? You're so much better than that. Don't you want someone your own height?"

"You mean, like you?" And everyone laughs in a clubby, knowing way. We were all a little concerned at first that Eowyn might fall for Faramir Two like this was an episode of Three's Company or something, but somehow he made the fact that he was not so much interested in girls (he likes girls! he loves them! just... yeah) very clear without ever having to announce it. In fact, I think that's why Eowyn likes him so much--he's nice and fun and completely unthreatening, whereas Her Dignity felt the need to shut Faramir One down on sight. I've come across them talking late into the night--I think I heard Eowyn confiding some of her Aragorn issues to him one time--and she's trying to get him to read Twilight but I don't know how well that's going to work out.

"Although, Edward is a pretty sharp dresser. At least hold out for the tall one--you can't even get the clothes off the action figures."

I think Faramir Two and I need to sit down and discuss strategy.


(More from the Secret Life of Dolls.)


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*Plays "I Wear my Sunglasses at night"*

HAHA. I work at Chapters (Canadian version of Barnes and Noble) and we sell those Edward dolls :P. I enjoy that we ONLY have Edward.. they made the mistake of sending us Edward, Jacob and James (?) posters/bookmarks/memorabillia and noooooo one wanted the Jacob or James ones :(. We don't have Bella!doll yet, but Edward looks funky and he's expensive :P I do enjoy that he has the James Dean!sunglasses though.

Chapters is like my favorite place on Earth. xD

These dolls certainly look... pissy, don't they?

They definitely all seem to have their bitchface perfected.

God, if Bella shows up, I wouldn't want to be in the room at night.

I'd need to get my own rocking chair to watch her from the corner.

The glasses look like there's a small chance they're removable... are all the dolls made by different companies?

The action figures, both versions, are NECA; the 17" doll is Tonner.

They're action figures. ♥

but they don't do any action, and they certainly don't get any. they're dolls. :)

You're right. Faramir Two is such fun.

I heart the little 2 in the corner of Faramir2's icon xD

Hahah I didn't really notice that until you pointed it out! That is awesome.

Faramir Two is getting on with everyone like a house afire--he can talk braids with the girls and swords with the boys. Faramir One sleeps in his box at night, curled up inside my headphones listening to various versions of "Wicked Game."

The fact that I'm at work is the only thing keeping me from dissolving into helpless giggles right now.

Poor Faramir. Cheer up emo Steward!

I think I rather like the Bella face, while not as bitch!face as the Tonner version, it's a nice blend of something when compared with I sparkled for a girl Edward doing the James Dean thing.

Also I think I could totally date Faramir 2... that is if I hadn't already had someone to him in high school.

"HE HAS NO SOUL!"

Oh Anna, ILU.

And Faramir2 (hee, I like your clear delineation in the icon) is completely wonderful. Whee.

This may be one of the best sitcoms ever

Faramir Two, what a scene-stealer!

I'd like to posit that the Tonner Bella is a good likeness of Kristen Stewart in the movie poster.

IMO Stewart is one of those chameleon girls -- she looks different in a different light or with different eyeliner or extra extensions or whatever. Good for acting but hard to pin down in a doll.

*giggles* Oh, Faramir Two, how you remind me of the Faramir Fanboy I once dated ("He's just like Faramir! And I'm his Eowyn, mommy") who is now dating well, let's just say it's not a girl. ;-)

I personally think you should get the glasses one, mostly because I find it hysterical. And then Faramir Two can turn him, and I don't mean in the vampy way.

Oh Eowyn, sweetie, dignity won't keep you warm o' nights! <3

Anna is absolutely hilarious.

I would love to see the hell your girls would put Bella through. Strong chicks like them against pansy pants? Awesome.

Oh, god, if Edward and Bella Dollen show up, there are going to be some serious dramz!

I am playing a violin of woe right now for Faramir 1 D: Poor boy. I mean man-doll.. thing.

I'm not very fond of the action figure ones, but I know the Tonner prices are so ridic and hard to manage.

I may be one of the few doll collectors for whom ridiculousness is a selling point, though. I mean, anything really hilarious is just fodder for the story.

*cuddles Faramir One, poor baby*

RPattz as James Dean...with sparkles!

At least hold out for the tall one--you can't even get the clothes off the action figures.

HAHAHAHA!

*claps hands over Faramir 1's head* I feel bad for saying this, but I sort of love Faramir 2. He's too too fun.

Also, I'm scared if you get any Edward Dollens. I fear the shelf will just become this chaotic chain of Family Meetings. (Oh Growing Up Cullen, how you've ruined me)

Oh sweet Jesus...

I adore the little "2" on Faramir 2's picture. And I scared the crap out of my cat (and have the claw marks to prove it) laughing my ass off at some of these parts. Most especially:

Faramir One was trying to get some advice from Fugagorn, who just pointed out (rather bitterly) that he had to read appendices to figure out what Purple Arwen's deal was, and now she's off with Helm's Deep Aragorn.

That just killed me.

I think removable sunglasses for Edward are important. If he can't take them off, how can he pretend to be David Caruso?

Is is bad that I lust for Edward and Davis Caruso?
Also, Axl Rose.

I have to say, I think Sunglasses!Edward is actually the best likeness of RPattz. I was not going to buy an Edward but now I'm wavering... >.> On the other hand though, I don't think my Agent Smith would stand for any competition in the Cool Shades department.

brother? twin? self?

Parallel incarnation?

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