Occupation: Girl

Please close the door and switch on the fun without fail.

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Golden Globes #1
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You guys, I don't even know. I am so incredibly, irrationally depressed. Like "spent two hours struggling not to cry" depressed. But the Fug Girls are on Twitter talking about how Julianne Moore is wearing half a cape and something unspeakable happened to Scarlett Johansson's hair. How am I supposed to let this go? On the other hand: Justin Bieber. I don't know that I can handle this.

(I just turned on the TV and an Abilify commercial came on. "If you're taking an antidepressant but are still depressed...")

(More commercials. I'm not saying The Cape is stupid. I'm saying it looks stupid. Deeply stupid.)

(Jesus, my TV reception is crappy for no good reason.)

O hai, it's the pre-show. Here's Helen Mirren, bejeweled and fierce in some shade of beige. I try not to use "fierce" too often, but I reserve it for her. Michael Douglas says he has beat cancer; Catherine Zeta-Jones is in a forest-green ballgown. (The Fug Girls are indicating that green is A Thing this year.) Claire Danes is wearing some sort of vivid--well, she calls it "hot pink." Kind of a coral tone? I don't know, between the stage lights and my reception she could be wearing what in the name of God is Jennifer Love Hewitt wearing. Some huge... silver... it's like... a satellite dish... around her boobs. I don't even know. Here's Christian Bale with a mane of hair and some sort of accent from the vicinity of the British Isles. It might be his real one, I can't tell. I don't think I've ever heard him use the same accent twice in the row, so I have no way of knowing. Here's Michelle Williams in... ah, the "khaki and daisies" the Girls were talking about. I mean, I'm sure it's not literally khaki, but... daisies. Daisy straps. Sure.

Trailer for The Rite. I always wonder what sort of "true story" these demonic possession/exorcism movies could possibly be based on. It's Anthony Hopkins being creepy. Who could have seen this coming?

OH GIRL. ANNE HATHAWAY. WHAT. It's like... skin-tight copper disco ball sheath. With long sleeves and no back. Amazing. Carrie Underwood is here for some reason in beige strapless sparkle, which is nice. I don't know. They're talking about Natalie Portman and not showing her and--oh. Pale pink, strapless something... red... up top. I don't know. It went by fast. She's pregnant, it'll do. I'm trying to read over the Fug and MTV liveblogs for hints on what these people are wearing and the latter is having too big a meltdown over Certain Teen Idols to be of any help. MEN WEAR SUITS, OKAY. I HAVE SUFFICIENT A GRIP ON THIS. I NEED COLORS FOR PEOPLE WHO ACTUALLY WEAR THEM.

Ah, what the hell. Let's hit post.

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I feel you. Really. SAD sucks.

If it helps, I am so glad you are doing this. I never get on LJ anymore, but I signed in tonight expressly hoping to read your live-blogging--I guess it's become a yearly tradition for me. You rock, Cleo!

Oh, and the Abilify commercials drive my husband and I NUTS.

Not as bad as the Pristiq commercials.

So is that possibly not Christian Bale's real accent? Maybe even he is confused by now. See, Method acting is bad for you.

Also, thanks for doing this - it's always such fun to read along with the madness...:)

Bale started doing an American accent for his Batman press tours, because he thought it would go over better if people didn't ask why Batman was suddenly British. And, when he's acting, he'll keep the same accent the whole time. Otherwise, he sounds English-y.

That's....exceedingly complicated...:)

Well, he wasn't that well-known when he did Batman Begins and I think he was trying to trick the press into thinking he was American. Apparently it worked? But he usually sounds English for awards shows. Also, remember the tape of him screaming at the lighting guy? He starts out speaking with the American accent he had adopted for the part, but the more he yells, the more English he sounds.

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You're right, which makes his decision to fake his accent that much more puzzling.

Interviewer: Most of the cast in this film is British and this is an American kind of Icon and we now sort of have an Anglo American Batman coming over with a British director. Do you see any kind of subtext?

Christian Bale: Yeah we're taking over American culture. (Laughs) You know what? I wouldn't look at this movie and see anything British about it. I live here this is my adopted home, Chris is half American, he lives here.

Interviewer: You've lost your accent

Christian Bale: Right now I did another movie, I finished doing that, it was called "Harsh Times." And I just felt that...when I'm not thinking about it I can hear that I get a slight Englishness coming into it. But I just feel that Batman is such an American character that in representing him in doing the interviews I don't want to be sounding English because that would be peculiar. I would expect people to be saying, 'what the hell is going on? Why do we have an English Batman?'


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I like "American Psycho." I want to see "The Fighter," though, I heard it was really good.

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Aww, was it 3D or something?

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Well, "The Fighter" is in 2D only I'm pretty sure.

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I'm gonna see if I get my BF to take me to either "The Fighter," "Black Swan," or ... what was the third option ... "The King's Speech." Christian Bale, Colin Firth, or Natalie Portman.

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Aw, Cleo, nice to see you on the job -- I'm just sorry you're feeling so badly. Sending hugs. Hope a little snark will lift your spirits a bit.

I think Carrie had a song nominated for the Narnia movie.

Wow, Ricky Gervais is laying the snark on REALLY thick this year. I've mentally said, "Oh, snap!" several times.

This. Also, I don't give a damn about award shows but I read your recaps for the lolz. So, thank you, and know that you are bringing just a little bit more snarky joy to a complete stranger's life. =)

Yays and about the Cape

It's really cool if you don't take it too seriously. For a good somewhat campy superhero show, it's really good. It's taking the place of Heroes because NBC needs another good action show. So I'm willing to give it a chance.

And yay Cleo liveblog!!! *Hugs* I'm sorry you're feeling so depressed.

OMG, Theodore Lawrence grew up!

IKR? I loved that movie. <3

Christen Bale, WHAT DID YOU DO TO YOUR HAIR?!?!?

Also, has he always had an English accent?

According to imdb he was born in the UK. But I think I've only seen him play American characters, so I was confused too.

Yeah. I just wiki-ed him as well. I totally thought he was an american.

He faked an American accent when he was doing press for Batman.

Well, when your breakout role is as someone named Jack "Cowboy" Kelly, you can't blame people for pegging you as a Yank.

I'm sorry you're feeling down bad. I hope this evening cheers you up some.

Wow, Katey Segal's dress is so very....orange?

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Did Christian Bale just swear copiously at the room? The sound cut off and then the whole room was laughing kind of uncomfortably.

Ugh, so sorry. I've been skidding along a rough patch myself, and in fact went to therapy for the very first time ever yesterday, so I kinda feel you. Fucking January, man.

Segue. I believe word was at the time that Christian Bale's accent for his Pocahontas character was his real one.

Oh, man. I totally forgot he was in Pocahontas! I feel like I need to watch that again now!

You're doing a fine job even though you're down. I feel your pain.

Hopefully this will cheer you up - you've probably seen it already but I just discovered it today and am COVERED in glee...get this: a movie about REAL vampires doing REAL vampiring...and NO ONE IS SPARKLING. Also: Paul Bettany and Karl Urban. Need I say more.


The Cape is gloriously ridiculous. The hero fights evil with the help of carny science and the main villain is a fruit loop named Chess who takes breaks from running the police force to put in rook-shaped contacts and cackle softly to himself.

And it has Keith David as the wise mentor/head of the carnies, so it's hard to go wrong there.

Love you, Cleo. I am laughing so hard already.

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Every geek I know turned off the pilot of The Cape before it ended....

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It was Ricky's advice to Hef's new fiancee to not look while having sex, and then his hand making suggestive "motions" out to one side, glance over to hand, gag on the sight of Hef's old soldier, repeat, that got the audience laughing, I think.

(More commercials. I'm not saying The Cape is stupid. I'm saying it looks stupid. Deeply stupid.)

Probably, but... Summer Glau! UNF.

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