Occupation: Girl

Please close the door and switch on the fun without fail.

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Dammit, I keep thinking today is Sunday
lolcat
cleolinda
So I pushed through a depressive funk and liveblogged the Golden Globes last night, because once the Heather and Jessica were on Twitter talking about how cracked-out some of the fashions were, I knew I would hate myself for sitting this one out. I have been doing this for far too long to give up now. Also, I decided that if I got over myself and fought through it, I could go buy myself a small treat (a 40% off coupon relevant to the situation didn't hurt). I think I will keep it off-story, because we already have enough vampires characters running around The Secret Life of Dolls. But yeah. /cryptic

Other things were also said elsewhere:

@cleolinda: It's so weird. I've been liveblogging things like this since 2001-ish, and now you can't find anyone who *isn't.*

@cleolinda: I was liveblogging on a GEOCITIES PAGE, people. Is it time for Jello yet? WHERE ARE MY DENTURES.

@cleolinda: Meryl Streep isn't nominated this year, is she? I don't know why we're bothering with this whole charade then.

@cleolinda: Because she's the best drunk ever. Maybe she'll get up and accept someone else's award anyway.


@cinematical: Check out a full list of all #GoldenGlobes winners http://aol.it/70XuCD

@fuggirls: Wake up with our Globes coverage! We've got HBC, J.Lo, JanJones, and more coming on the half-hour: www.gofugyourself.com


@marcusgilmer: If you were like me and missed the Gervais monologue, @GawkerTV has you covered: http://bit.ly/f74gTo

@Movieline: Judd Apatow and at least anonymous member of the HFPA had a problem with Ricky Gervais last night. Should we though? http://bit.ly/ezbCGs

They also say that several celebrities (or Their People, rather) have called to complain. So it looks like he won't be invited back. Even though, as I pointed out (on the last liveblog entry?) that if this was Gervais's second year, then they knew what they were getting into.

@rabartlett: It says a lot about what Hollywood thinks of itself when they hire a comedian who regularly takes on God, but are shocked when he mocks them.

To be fair, Gervais also rounded out the evening by thanking God for making him an atheist.


@DawnTaylor666: Really? They actually cut the audio on Bale?

@snacky: My mother just told Christian Bale "enough is enough" in Armenian. He drove her to speak a language she isn't even fluent in.

Apparently they bleeped him because he was trying to lean down and shout to Robert De Niro that he is "the shit."


@JohnFugelsang: I tuned in late but I think I saw Alec Guiness & David Bowie give an award to Count Chocula.

I have spent more time than I should have trying to figure out which award he was talking about. "David Bowie" might possibly be SWINTON? I don't know?


Truth: @marcusgilmer: In 2004, Lindsay Lohan split into two, kinda like Gollum. The good one is now known as Emma Stone.

@Salome: Is that why ES is so tangerine tonight?


@EWJohnYoung: Claire Danes on winning her second Golden Globe: "Now I can actually stuff my bra, cause I got two!"

Good loser, or best loser? @SofiaVergara: I don't care!!! I already have my Golden Globes!!!!!!!!hahhahha


@SmartBitches: I have just seen a preview for "Gnomeo and Juliet." A movie in 3D. Oh, no.

@cleolinda: What in the name of God was that. Garden gnomes and... what.

@snacky: @cleolinda I think I have more nightmare fuel to add to the hip-hop hamsters.


And finally: Kermit Bale rides again.



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KERMIT BALE!!!!!

Sorry, I have nothing else to add to this other than I want Olivia Wilde's dress so I can wear it all the time and pretend I'm a pretty pretty princess and make swooshy noises.

No kidding. I would wear that dress around the house to, like, vacuum. I might even purchase a fake tiara to go with it.

Geocities! Oh god, apparently I also need dentures.

I don't know about the rest of you, but if Ricky Gervais wanted to make fun of me and my friends for 3 hours while we got trashed on free booze, I'd consider myself the luckiest girl in the world.

I thought he was hilarious. I wish he could host every awards show.

My thoughts exactly. It's not like he was telling jokes that no one had heard/said before. He just made them better with his delivery.

Also: I thought Melissa Leo did an excellent job of filling in for Meryl in the "Best Acceptance Speech by a Drunk Actress" category.

Even though, as I pointed out (on the last liveblog entry?) that if this was Gervais's second year, then they knew what they were getting into.

I was thinking that, but after rewatching his opening, I have to say I disagree. It would be one thing if he were offensive and funny, which is definitely what they hired him for. But he was offensive and his jokes were stale, which is just wrong. I mean, I'm sure that the celebrities whose panties are in a twist aren't upset over a really weak Hugh Hefner joke, but I would think that the people whose idea it was to hire him again were pissed that the material wasn't better.

Claire Danes on winning her second Golden Globe: "Now I can actually stuff my bra, cause I got two!"

My spirit animal, for real.

Apparently it really was just that they were offended, but yeah. Charlie Sheen, Scientologists, and Hugh Hefner? It was biting without being particularly relevant.

Thank you for your liveblog! I didn't watch the show and it makes me feel like I got all the best parts.

(As for your treat for yourself -- a Draculaura from Justice? Wait, no, you don't have to answer that. I'm just saying; if anyone deserves a Draculaura, it's you! XD)

Well, we may not have Meryl Streep, but we did have Paul Giamatti drunk on "chocolate" and rambling about having three wives and being repeatedly bleeped.

You bought a Tiny Alice, didn't you.

(Deleted comment)
Thanks very much for live-blogging the Globes. They're not televised here, and my newspaper's liveblog was so behind for a while that you'd already blogged 3-4 awards and they were still on the red carpet! I have greatly enjoyed your live blogging as ever, and I really appreciate that you did it even though you were feeling far from your best.

Draculaura? Oh, congrats! I love mine. Monster High= awesome.

/guessing, if not her, then CONGRATS ON RANDOM VAMPIRE DOLL.

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I want her little coffin bed SO BAD

I just watched Gervais' monologue through the link you posted and enjoyed it. It's not particularly relevant, as you say, and sure I see how it's offensive to those involved, but I found at least half the jokes legit funny.

>>>"David Bowie" might *possibly* be SWINTON? I don't know?

They're each other's secret identities.

Congradulations with getting Some Mysterious New Vampire.

I thought the idea of Gnomeo and Juliet sounded really dumb. But I saw the trailer before Harry Potter and...well...it looks sort of okay. I'm kind of scared what that says about me.

Aww, you got yourself a Draculaura, huh? That's what I was about to go to the post office to mail to you. :(

Aw, no! That was really sweet of you!

I am SO SO glad that you were able to liveblog the Globes. I know it was hard for you, so I appreciate it all the more!

Loooving all the snowy woods pics on your tumblr at the moment. What brought on that particular search?

The ice last week, of course. :)

Cleo:
I'm a follower of yours, recently quoted a post of yours in my blog. Just wanted to FYI you! http://www.redroom.com/blog/mbread/the-hunger-games-ya-fiction-maturity-0

-M.B.Read

I wanted to say thanks for the recap, as I generally do not have the attention span deep enough interest to sit through a whole award show.
I hope you're feeling better! :)

Gnomeo and Juliet comes from the guy responsibel for Book of Bunny Suicides and Robbie the Reindeer (did you get that over there?). I have been waiting for it for legit 4 years. If it's going to be awful...*cries*

There's a package on its way to you! I sent it Priority Mail, so it should be there -- tomorrow? I think?

Aw, that's really sweet. I'll keep an eye out for it.

Um, well I sound like an idiot, idc. Been reading m15m for... ever. love em. sorry for the depressed funk, seems that time of year for us all. Keep turning out the parodies, you got a gift. I envy it.

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