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Please close the door and switch on the fun without fail.
cleolinda
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HEY YOU GUYS I WAS IDLY WATCHING THE CREDITS WAITING ON THE PREVIEW FOR NEXT WEEK AND I SAW MY COUSIN'S NAME! TRUFAX. You know, my mother's cousin the set decorator, the one who did Van Helsing ! (And House !) I didn't see her listed on the True Blood IMDB page so I thought maybe she'd ended up not doing the show, but she DID! She was totally on the credits on the actual TV! THIS IS IRRATIONALLY EXCITING FOR ME, SHUT UP.

Look at you, all pornalicious )


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cleolinda
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First: Recap icons from [info]phlourish_icons!

Second: I have got to give a million thanks and e-cookies to [info]mcamason, who has saved both my fingers and my sanity by finding transcripts of the dialogue captioning. They don't describe the action (or even tell you who's speaking), so just reading the dialogue isn't really going to help if you didn't watch the show, but it's a lifesaver for me, because I can go copy-paste the exact lines I want to use and then check them against a single viewing of the show without having to spend three hours pausing and unpausing and transcribing it myself. Shit, Lafayette's Epic Moment of Awesome wouldn't have taken half an hour to write if I'd had these.

So! So she goes running barefoot in Lizzie Bennet's best negligee )


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cleolinda
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Since I posted two flashback links yesterday, I'm going to cheat and post them again today, because (attn: new readers!) the Gerald story is pretty much the one story you need to read even if you never read anything else. I mean, probably.

On to the recap! Is like watchin' Animal Planet, yeah? Any second she gon bite his head off, I swear )


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cleolinda
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Today's Journal Birthmonth Flashback, since I haven't posted anything else today: let's do the one-two punch of the "blocks of wood" story and the followup with Gerald.

On to the recap! Sam leans back in his chair, wringing his hands all alone, fit to fursplode )


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cleolinda
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Today's Journal Birthmonth Flashback: An entry about my mother that involves Lynn Collins in an extremely peripheral way. (She played Portia, you will recall.) But it seems fitting, given that this episode is her blaze of glory.

Recap icons! Bring me links if you make any and I'll post them.

Parts of this recap may be completely made up )


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cleolinda
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I was good and got work done! Kind of. Uh. WE ARE GETTING BEHIND ON THE RECAPS, LET US DO MORE.

So, previously on "True Blood": Vampires have "come out of the coffin" (sigh). God Hates Fangs. The Woevolins ushered in a vampire and his SEXY VOICE to the little town of Bon Temps, and Anna Paquin seems to have lost her badonkadonk, but she is definitely a lady. And a waitress. And psychic. Also: vampire porn.

Sookie retorts with mustardy vengeance )


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cleolinda
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Today's The Month What My Journal Was Born In flashback: I learned my recappin' in a hard school, y'all. For about three months, I wrote daily Days of Our Lives recaps. And then, between my class schedule changing and the show being on every weekday, I burnt out. BUT THE LESSONS I LEARNED STAYED WITH ME FOREVER. And as soon as I figure out what those lessons were, I'll let you know.

So what I ended up doing this morning was going back and tagging those entries so that you can get them all together (start at the bottom here and move up). Quick excerpts, if you'd like to see what my recapping style was like four years ago: WOMAN, JUST GO TO THE OLIVE GARDEN WITH ME )


I never did find out how the Bizarro Salem or the Love Cage storylines ended up, by the way.


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cleolinda
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Okay, I got a lot of work done this weekend and I am burned out on doing any more for the moment, so I feel like doing some recappin'. We're up to four episodes of True Blood now, but I'm going to go back and start from the beginning. This one's going to be a bit in-depth because we've got all the who's who and what's what to establish. And because I said so. (Man, I love HBO OnDemand.)

You may be a vampire but when you talk to me, you will talk to me like the lady that I am! )


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Current Music: The Killers, "Human," because I like my irony

cleolinda
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All right. I'm gonna try a recap, but it's just gonna be a rough one. Not only am I working on one viewing, as usual, but I'm flying without any notes this time. On the up side, I was actually able to watch the show this time. Yup, it's the Abrams Special, right on time )


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cleolinda
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You know, it's interesting--I think I did a good enough job liveblogging the SAGs and Golden Globes, and maybe that's because they're both shorter shows; maybe it's because they're not larded with as much Important Importantness, and a simple description of what's happening is enough. But the Oscars? I went back and read through a few of last year's entries (this was in search of the "I hope they missed" link), and I really think that recapping them the day after resulted in a better, clearer, more thoughtful take. (Also, I had access to acceptance speech transcripts and picture links.) So I'll probably do the same thing next year--liveblog the shorter shows that most people outside the U.S. have no way of seeing, and recap the Oscars the day after. Particularly since it was much more fun to kick back and eat ice cream and check off the ballot from the newspaper in a leisurely fashion.

(The recaps have video links as well, where available--which means that you will actually get to see the burning cars and the interpretive molestation and the Most Awesome Oscar Moment of My Entire Lifetime. What I realized fairly late in the game, however, was that I can actually screencap from videos at YouTube, so just for fun, I might put up a few Great Oscar Moments. You want to see Morgan Freeman's Penguin Godlight, don't you?)

Also from YouTube: Natalie Portman’s SNL digital short. Like "Lazy Sunday," it's a rap. Only... a little more violent this time.





And then a Viking shows up. What?


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cleolinda
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All done. God, I'm tired.

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FYI, the first three parts of the Oscar recap are up at [info]dailydigestnews. You'll want to start here. Read slowly; I'm still writing, and adding as I go.


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cleolinda
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So the Lovely Emily, a bottle of moscato and I watched this one together, and then we watched Invasion, and then I went to bed because my eyes hurt like hell, and then today I watched it on tape (my mother was taping it so she could watch something else), and so between y'all's comments and the tape, I was able to catch a lot more stuff. Yeah, it's not a same-night recap, but the process is a lot more relaxed this way, so... who knows what we'll do next week?

John! Stop! I think there's something dAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! )





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cleolinda
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I was promised orgies, and by God, I got... something.

They're this icky combination of creepy and twee, neither of which you really want underscoring your debauchery )

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cleolinda
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Wow, I've slipped to TWOP rates of recap turnover. I have fairly decent notes, but if I'm fuzzy... oh, who am I kidding? It's not like anyone's really going to care if I get something wrong with Empire.

The Promised Land of HoYay )



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Hmm. Well, now that I have the time, it suddenly occurred to me that I should recap Empire. I mean, hey, it's only six episodes, right? Also, ABC would have you know that it is THE BIGGEST TELEVISION EVENT OF THE SUMMER!!, because, judging from the commercials, nothing says "quality TV" like "women wearing fruit."

But they're showing two of those episodes tonight [Editor's note: I started writing this right after the show ended. You'll see what I mean]--that is so much recapping! Woe unto me, what shall I do? So I watched it in a chat room with some fine folks as a means of sort of taking notes. Little did I realize, however, that this is basically fifteen minutes of show in a two-hour bag. Which is still plenty of time to get drunk, if you play the Crap Miniseries Drinking Game, Empire Edition: drink whenever you hear "Hail Caesar!," "...for the Republic!," "protect," and, if you really have an iron liver, anything stolen from a movie. Warning: I am not responsible for the inevitable death by alcohol poisoning if you do this.

They stare at each other moistly )

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cleolinda
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The bad news: I wasn't able to make the Monday deadline.

The good news: I think we're still in the game for an October release, because they really, really seem to have a lot of faith in this project, and probably more than I deserve, so I'm funnying away as fast as I can on LOTR and Potter. P.S. Spider-Man turned out AWESOME.

The bad news: There will be no Lost recap tonight. Again.

The good news: I will go back and recap the missing episodes before the season finale, if I can finish the book this week, which dear God is what has to happen. I'm not getting a whole lot of sleep at the moment, obviously.

I'm not going to turn off comments like I did for the last entry, but please keep in mind--well, first of all, thanks so much for y'all's patience. But "OH NOOOOOES, RECAP WOE"? Kind of not what I need to hear right now. I feel bad enough about it as it is.



ETA: Oh! I totally forgot to tell y'all about the Squishy's Star Wars review from yesterday!

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cleolinda
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Okay, y'all: here's the thing. What I expected, and what I think most of y'all expected, was a clip show that was going to put everyone's flashbacks together and maybe show more clearly how everyone was connected. Cut for extreme recapping. Includes new material for early episodes )

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cleolinda
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Cleolinda Jones
User: [info]cleolinda
Name: Cleolinda Jones
Website: Cleoland
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