I'm really trying not to spam LJ today, and... I'm doing a very bad job of it.
Anyway. He's not on LJ, so I feel it is doubly important that I alert you to Eric's blog ...of charm and strange, because he is retelling urban legends (*luff*) and you need to see this.
Eric's Urban Legends: "Humans Can Lick, Too"
This one happened to a friend of a friend of a woman I used to work with. She was living alone at the time, just her and her dog, in an apartment downtown. So, one night she was woken up by a strange sound, it sounded like someone was in her apartment or something. But she didn't want to get worked up over nothing, so she put her hand down over the edge of the bed, because she was always reassured when her dog licked her hand. She felt the licking and fell asleep again right away.
The next morning, the woman woke up and screamed -- there was a message written in blood on her wall! It said, "HUMANS CAN LICK, TOO." Frantically, she looked around and couldn't find her dog anywhere. When the police arrived, they told her, "You've never had a dog. What you've been raising all these years was in fact a deranged serial killer pretending to be a dog." So she had to throw out all that dog food.