What we need to bring back is cloaks.
Think of them as all-over coats. I'm tired of putting on a coat and still having my legs freeze. I'm not saying we need velvet cloaks, or those grey elfy things the Fellowship wear, or even Victorian froufrou opera capes lined with satin. This ain't yer mama's cloak. I'm saying we need to get--let's say, Old Navy--to put out some performance fleece cloaks. For colors we'll have heather grey, India ink, snowflake, ultramarine, incarnadine, mochaccino, and ponderosa pine. Or you can think up even stupider color names; it's all the same to me. We can put cargo pockets in 'em if you want, or line 'em with faux rabbit fur. You can have convertible sleeves-to-armholes. Zippers and detachable hoods and shit, I don't care. All I know is, I'll be able to stand on the fourth floor of the Humanities building, which is set up like a cheap concrete motel--one big outdoor balcony running around a complex of classrooms--in head-to-toe fleece on a night with a tearing wind and I won't feel a thing.