December 20th, 2012

msauvage purple

Thoughts on the apocalypse

I want to begin by saying that, intellectually, I do not believe the world is going to end tomorrow, or on any other particular day--as an adult, I don't believe the ending of the world, such as it might be, would be a single-day affair. But as a child, I was terrified of it.

For those of you who may somehow be unaware of this cultural institution, the Weekly World News was a grayscale tabloid that was basically The X-Files in newspaper form, only if Mulder had never had a Scully. And one day, I was shifting idly from foot to foot in the checkout line behind my mother and our grocery cart, as you do when you're eight years old and you're having to do adult things with adults, and time slows to a crawl, maybe even starts moving backwards. I was one of those Good Children you hear about, who never threw tantrums or whined, and endured all rips in the time-space-attention span continuum with infinite quiet. So I'm reading the Weekly World News front page, and this particular summery week, they are here to inform me that the world will end, most definitely, on a particular date about two years in the future. Collapse )