Cleolinda Jones (cleolinda) wrote,
Cleolinda Jones

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This and that

From: Annabelle Webster

Subject: Looking for cheap high-quality software? sequester plums

Annabelle? I sequestered the plums, but... they don't seem to be doing anything. A little help here?

I just discovered--after about three years of using this damn software, by the way--that ACDSee has an auto-resize function. Like, you highlight all the files you want, and you specify the width and the height (or the percent you want them enlarged or reduced), and it does it all for you. This may not seem all that exciting until you realize that I've downloaded tons of movie screen caps over the years that had wonky proportions, and I had to go through and manually resize them all to, say, 840 x 480 or whatever. Oh my God. I was so happy to discover this just now that I almost cried.

(Also? It will convert extensions for you. Like, all the bmps to jpgs or the jpgs to gifs. Cried, I tell you.)

DiCaprio Gets Lifetime Achievement Award. Holy crap, the guy is thirty. Yes, I know he's a great actor. THIRTY.

Jacob's new American Idol recap: "Then there is a freaky, freaky slow motion shot of Seacrest throwing beads off a balcony at an unknown, unseen figure. I feel all of a sudden like I'm in Midnight In The Garden Of Good And Evil and the deeds are unfolding and sins will be visited on the people." The best part is really about the hot incestuous brothers who sing "I'll Make Love to You" to each other, however, and how conflicted horrified Jacob feels over this.

(Oh, man. I am still so giddy over the image editing thing. Nerrrrrrrrrrd.)

I feel really bad for the kid who apparently lost his frog, but... do you remember the "All Your Base" clip? Where the whole Engrish video game catchphrase thing was photoshopped into approximately 1001 different pictures? Yeah. This site basically does that with the "I lost my frog" flier. Only it's web pages, not video, and it's... well, it's a little more creative. Like, Domo-kun is involved. And Guernica. And security cameras. And Hellboy. And Saruman. Here's the one that slew me.

This commercial has been banned from the Super Bowl, which is a damn shame.

From peot (One of Many Martins): Star Wars: Episode III--A Lost Hope.

Meme: If there is at least one person in your life whom you consider a close friend, and whom you would not have met without the Internet, post this sentence in your journal.

Yes, my real name is Lauren. Yes, I meant to say so--I've mentioned it in passing before, and as paranoid as I tend to get, even I don't think y'all are going to be able to track me down based on a first name that's pretty common in my area, particularly for girls my age. (I don't know why that is, either. My mother was all proud in 1978 that she'd picked a name no one else was using, and then a few months later her friend named her baby Lauren, and it was just all downhill from there.)

People have asked me how I can bear to use a pen name and not see My Real Birth Name of All That Is Holy in print. I don't know. I have complicated feelings about my name, first and last. I'm to the point where I like it well enough, generally speaking; I've moved past that adolescent stage of wishing everything about me was different. But I kind of like the idea of having a name that's just for me. Really, this should tell you what an egotist optimist I am: I'm planning on needing one name for public life and another for private.

That said? I'm starting to want to see my real name more often. I don't get called "Lauren" much--I mean, do you get called by your first name often? Think about it. Unless someone's going through the house looking for you or calling you up on the phone, they're not just going to start every sentence addressed to you with your name. (Which is why it rings so false in fictional dialogue. And yet I have a huge compulsion to write dialogue that way, too.)

On the other hand, think about the internet as a print medium. I don't hear "Cleolinda" much, but I see it stinkin' everywhere--in my email, on, on message boards when I log in:

"Welcome back, Cleolinda!"

"Cleolinda, So-and-So just posted a reply to a topic that you have subscribed to."

"Logged in user: cleolinda."

I knew things had gone too far when I had lunch at Panera Bread over Christmas and the guy asked me for my name, instead of giving me a beeper thing, and I actually hesitated: But--I don't want to say "Cleolinda" in front of all these people, they'll think it's a weird na.... WAIT A MINUTE. So you'll forgive me if I feel the urge to call myself Lauren every now and then. Just for sanity's sake.

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