Great--now I have a headache.
Not that this is any different from usual, but I feel like I should say it, since a lot of new people are reading: I watch these eps live on TV and then write the recap. One viewing. I have no tape (my VCR is dead), I have no TiVo. I take notes, and my eyes and ears are fallible. If I make mistakes, let me know in the comments, and I'll fix anything really egregious or misleading.
Previously on: "Sir, you did not tell us about your condition!" Locke is in a wheelchair at the walkabout tour offices in Sydney shrieking, "DON'T TELL ME WHAT I CAN'T DO!" And then we see him first getting up after the plane crash as his voice from the previous bit continues, "THIS IS MY DESTINY!" Very nicely cut together, I have to say.
The hatch. Locke and Boone are trying to figure out how to open it. Again. To that end, they're building--well, you'll see.
Flashback to... "Younger" Locke. And by "younger" I mean "Holy combover wig, Batman!" Oh, poor Terry O'Quinn. Apparently he's working at "Toy Zone," which kind of makes me wonder--what about the box company? Is this before the box company? If it's before the box company, how'd he get into that job in his wheelchair? Does he work two jobs? Is this the best he can do, seriously, given how brilliant this guy is? I don't know, and we're not going to find out, because a little boy comes up and wants to know what the game on display is, and Locke says that it's his favorite game that he and his brother used to play: Mousetrap. Wait, what? How old is Mousetrap, exactly? How old is Locke? Anyway, he's distracted from explaining the trapping-of-mouse mechanism to the kid by Swoosie Kurtz lurking a few feet away in a giant floor-length fur coat. Finally, he's all like, "Can I help you?" "Could you tell me where the footballs are?" she asks. Uh... huh.
Back at the hatch. Pull back, and it turns out that they've basically built a giant wooden Mousetrap over the hatch. (Well, I guess that explains the treetrunk bathtub and bamboo seesaw.) Boone's getting tired: "John? You want my opinion..." "No, but when I do, I'll give it to you," says Locke. Okay, he says it in my head. That still counts, right? "Have some faith," he (actually) says. "All we have to do is break this glass, and we're in. A trebuchet produces half a ton of force." Now, I went and looked this up, because I, unlike Boone, can actually spell trebuchet, and I came up with "A medieval catapult for hurling heavy stones." What Locke and Boone have built is more like a giant loggy contraption that's supposed to slam down on the glass of the hatch. (Also? That's some pretty strong damn hell ass glass.) But I majored in Spanish, not medieval weaponry, so don't look at me.
Anyway, they're putting the final touches on the trebuchet, and Boone's like, "You never talk about yourself. Everybody's got a story. And I should know, because Jack and Kate each got two before I even got one, and mine was just about me getting seduced by my stepsister." And Locke's like, "Son, I'm pretty sure my story would bore you in comparison to that." And then they fire up the trebuchet, and the trebuchet totally goes boom. I'm talking breaks against the glass, comes apart at the joints, falls over, gets schooled. And the hatch is like, MUAHAHAHAHA! Stupid sexy hatch.
"John!" Locke's like, what? "Your leg, man!" Locke looks down, and he's got about a foot of metal sticking out of his leg. UM, OW? He yanks it out while Boone stares on, agog. "You okay?" "Yeah," says Locke. "I'm fine." He doesn't sound fine.
Cavetown-on-Deadpool. Locke wraps up his leg and starts poking himself up and down the calf with a spare safety pin. I gather from his reaction that he's not feeling anything. He pokes his other calf up and down; can't feel anything there either. So then he picks up a flaming branch from the fire and AHHHHH NO STOP DON'T BURN YOURSAHHHHHHHHHHHH! The bottom of Locke's foot has also gone numb. And now, crispy. We get a nice DUN DUN DUN as we go out to commercial.
Back at the hatch. "Everything breaks with enough force!" shouts Locke, but Boone is not so sure. Failing that? "THE ISLAND WILL TELL US WHAT TO DO!" Boone's like, the hell? And there goes Locke snapping that his leg is fine. Uh huh.
Parking lot, Toy Zone. Swoosie Kurtz is following Locke around giving him crazy looks, so Locke starts chasing her through the parking lot, and--seriously, I can't tell who's following who here, because every time he loses her, she pops back up. And then a car backing out hits him WAH! But poor Locke just sort of bounces a little and gets up and keeps ticking (I can't be the only one who expected to find out firsthand how Locke got paralyzed at some point in this episode). So finally he catches up and grabs her all like, "Who ARE you?!" "I'm your mother," she says. BULLSHIT BULLSHIT BULLSHIT.
Coffee shop. "I don't know why you think I'm your son," says Locke, "particularly since I was born in 1952 and you were born in 1944. I don't mean to be rude, but... what do you want?" "I want to tell you that you're special," intones Swoosie. "VERY SPECIAL. You are part of a design. You realize that, don't you? Our meeting is a sign of things to come. Great things. And much better hair. Or lack thereof, even." Locke's like, "What about my father? Is he still alive?" The unspoken question here is sort of, "And who IS he, anyway?" "Still alive?" repeats Swoosie. "Don't you understand? You don't HAVE a father. You were immaculately conceived!" Whoooooooo! Ten minutes in and already I'm out of WTF, y'all.
The gardens of Sunisia. Sawyer is hassling poor Sun about leaves: "Which one!" "That one," says Sun. "You sure? It's not helping!" Kate moseys on over all, "What's not helping what?" And Sawyer clams up, all "Nothin'," and leaves. Like Sun's not going to spill the whole story the moment he's out of earshot. It's called the power of girl talk, hon. "So what was that about?" asks Kate. "Headaches," says Sun. Kate's all like, "What, he doesn't have anything in that giant stash of his for that? Advil? Tylenol? Tiny booze?" "He says aspirin doesn't help," says Sun. Kate looks concerned.
So she goes to Cavetown-on-Deadpool, where Jack is shaving in a tree. We banter around a little, but it comes down to Kate saying, "Someone's got bad headaches. Okay, it's Sawyer. I think he might really have something wrong. Can't you go check him out?" Jack's all like, yeah, he's gonna love that. "All I'm going to get out of him is a snappy one-liner... and if I'm real lucky, a brand new nickname." Can we take that as a shoutout? (ETA: I'm kidding! Like we're the only people who noticed the nicknaming thing--come on.)
The hatch. Locke's all, "You're late for work, Boone!" Whoa! Simmer down there, Scarface McBossyboots. Boone's like, "Yeah? Well, I think I'm done. We can't get the hatch open." "DON'T TELL ME WHAT I CAN'T DO!" roars Locke--oh, no, Boone! You set him off again! If he calls you "Helen," run. "We didn't find this hatch by accident!" he insists. Boone's like, "Oh, really. If we're supposed to open it, then why haven't we already?" Locke's all up in the whole "The island will send us a sign and test our faith and brighten our whites!" thing when all of a sudden there's AN AIRPLANE OVERHEAD OMG, and Locke's like, "Boone! Did you see that! Boone!" And he looks over at Boone, and Boone is just staring up at the sky, and then there's Swoosie in the background pointing at something and the film is all weird and rushed and jerky and Boone starts monotoning, "Theresa falls up the stairs, Theresa falls down the stairs. Theresa falls up the stairs, Theresa falls down the stairs," and Locke's back in his wheelchair and he's all like, "NOOOOOOO!," and then he falls out and it's night and it's Cavetown and dude, this episode is weird. Upside: Locke gets a total Epiphany Look on his face as we go out to commercial.
Nothing really good on the commercials this week. Except that if your little brother ever locks the keys in the car while lost on the road in a carjacking, you want OnStar. Or something.
I'm not sure where Boone is sleeping, but it might be New Jungleton. "BOONE! WAKE UP!" "Whatimizzit?" blears Boone. What, it's fifteen after stopped watch? Can they even keep track of time anymore? "It's morning!" says Locke, and he is a LIAH. But he drags Boone off anyway.
Flashback. "Emily Annabeth Locke, in 10,000 words or less," says this guy holding a folder. He's apparently helping Locke find his parents. You'll remember that he grew up in a series of foster homes. Emily's been institutionalized for some type of schizophrenia, at which point I called up my bookie (what? Who do you think handles my Oscar betting?) and said, "Put a hundred down on 'was in same hospital as Hurley.' " And what about Locke's father? "Here's the thing," says the guy, not quite ready to give up the folder yet. "Your mother came to you, so she's fair game. But your father... some of this stuff just isn't meant to be. A lot of guys don't even know they have kids. This won't have a happy ending." Locke's like, "Dude, you don't understand. She says my father is GOD. GIMME."
Awww! Locke drives the cutest little cherry red VW bug. ("Hey, while you're at it? Put down fifty on 'paralyzed in really cute car.' ") He drives up to some mansion and tells the security guard that he's "Anthony Cooper's son," and we go through the whole "He doesn't have a son" / "No, really, I don't want anything" bit before Locke says, "Tell him that my mother is Emily Locke. Please?" This seems to ring a bell with the guard, which--if you're watching this for the first time--makes it sound like Emily Locke is notorious at Casa Cooper, which is interesting. Meanwhile, a security camera is panning back and forth over Locke like it's got a life of its own. Creeeeeepy.
Casa Cooper. "Well," says the old guy. "This is... awkward." P.S. Locke's fauxmbover is distracting to the max. It's a little Kevin Spacey, actually. "Something tells me I'm gonna want a drink for this," says Papa de Locke. I cannot tell you how fake and smarmy this guy comes off from the first moment he's onscreen. The trick, of course, is figuring out what, exactly, he's faking and why. He gets Locke some Scotch and asks about Crazy Emily: "Who found who?" "She found me." "How does she look?" "About three years younger than me," says Locke. "She say anything about me?" "Uh... that I was immaculately conceived." Papa de Locke thinks that this is hilarious: "I guess that makes me God!" So. Much. Hate. We then find out that Papa de Locke didn't even know there was a baby until Locke was a year old, when Crazy Emily (can we call you Crazily for short?) showed up asking for money, saying that she'd put Locke up for adoption. Which shows you that she's crazy, because... wouldn't you be more likely to get money out of the guy if you kept his kid? Moron. "You have a family of your own?" "No sir," says Locke. "Me neither," smarms Papa de Locke. "Tried it a couple of times, didn't take." HAAAAAATE. "Do you hunt?" "No, no," says Locke quickly. I started laughing at this point--is this how Locke got started on his whole outback obsession? "Doing anything on Sunday? You wanna go hunting?" Ohhhhhh no. (pescivendolo in the discussion entry comments: "Hunting NEVER ends in paralysis. Ever. I swear.")
The hatch. Locke is telling Boone that he asked for a sign and he got a dream, he saw a yellow plane crash, and it was "the most real thing I've ever experienced. I know where to go now. To get what we need." "John? You been using that wacky paste stuff that made me think my sister got eaten?" says Boone. (No, he actually says this. You think I'm kidding.) "Who's Theresa?" asks Locke abruptly, and Boone is all freaked out. "We're supposed to go out there," insists Locke. "We're supposed to find that plane." Boone says nothing, but gets up and goes with him.
The uneasy alliance of Jinmark and Bosnia-Mercutiovina. Jack strolls by and compliments the boys on their raft progress. Apparently Mercutio has picked up a little Korean: "Yeah, faster and idiot." Meanwhile, there's Sawyer on arsonwatch under a tree with a rag over his eyes (aww!). "Having trouble with your head?" says Dr. Jack. "What, now she got you makin' housecalls?" jackholes Sawyer. "Are you sensitive to light?" asks Dr. Jack. "I'm sensitive to YOU," snarls Sawyer. "Hey, you know what..." says Dr. Jack, and he just starts walking off, like, "Forget it." But then Sawyer breaks down and calls after him, "Sensitivity to light? Is that bad?" Jack comes back. "Depends on what causes your headaches." "Well, it's not like it's a tumor," says Sawyer. All right, guys. Get it out now. Get it all out of your system: IT'S NOT A TUUUUUUUMAAAAAAAH. There. Feel better? "What makes you think it's a tumor?" asks Jack. "I don't," snaps Saywer. Jack's all like, "Great, fine, whatever." He starts walking off again. "My uncle..." calls out Sawyer--like, seriously, man, get off your ass and talk to the guy, okay? Don't make him keep going back and forth. "My uncle, he... uh, died of a brain tumor. That run in the family, tumors?" "What type?" asks Jack. "The type that KILLS YOU," says Sawyer. HA. Jack asks if he's smelling phantom smells, like something burning, but no, Sawyer just has headaches. "I'm sure you're fine, then. If this is worrying you, there's a couple of tests I can do..." Ah, yes, the coconut CAT scan. Effective, but sticky. "Sorry, doc," smarms Sawyer, "my insurance ran out." " 'Insurance ran out'! Ha! That's a good one!" says Jack. Oh, hon, you dork. So he hikes back up the beach, leaving Sawyer to sniff at the air suspiciously.
The jungles of Luxemboone. "I could have mentioned Theresa while I was talking to myself," says Boone. "While we were working. Maybe." "But you didn't," says Locke, with an interesting finality. They're discussing the dream plane when Locke suddenly goes down like a ton of bricks. A ton of bricks with no legs, I guess. He's all, "I'm FINE!" and then they find... a rosary? "Someone from camp hiked all the way up here?" says Boone. Awww! Boone is not bright. "Nope," says Locke, pointing up. And then a dead body falls out of the trees, and a wormipede or something crawls out of the eye socket. MMMMM.
A rainy day at Casa Cooper, where Locke is now on a first-name basis with Eddie the security guard. "Gonna get some birds again?" asks Eddie, handily informing us that the hunting expeditions have become a routine. But when Locke gets there, Papa de Locke is hooked up a dialysis machine all like, "You weren't supposed to be here so early! Now you know my secret! Oh, woe." Of course Papa de Locke, who currently has no other family to donate, needs a kidney transplant. "When?" asks Locke. "Tomorrow, if it were up to me," says the old guy, but of course he's hardly a priority on the donor list at his age, money or no money. Oh God, I think we all see where this is going.
Jungle. "He was a priest," pronounces Locke. "Usually clothing decomposes within two years--" "How do you know that?" asks Boone. "Oh, I learned it from Jack," says Locke, "who learned it from TV. But this is high quality polyester, so it could be anywhere from two to ten years." Also on the body? Gold teeth, wads of Nigerian cash, and a gun. I am thinking that this guy was a costume-rental priest, myself.
The Sawyerland raftyards. Sawyer watches the waves angstfully while a bunch of redshirts are whacking and slamming and rehearsing for Stomp. "You wanna keep it down?" he hollers, and Sawyer's about to throw a major hissy when Kate marches over: "That's it, get up! GET UP! You're going to see Jack!" Sawyer: "What are you, the lollipop?" Eeeeee! (ETA: I have been reliably informed that he actually says, "Do I get a lollipop?" I still prefer my version: same premise, extra dash of innuendo. Heh.)
Dr. Jack's consultation cave. Apparently Sawyer's headaches started "a few days ago, a week maybe," and they usually start up in the middle of the day. And then he bitches at Kate, who's enjoying herself muchly, to leave. And what the hell is Jack doing, anyway (he wants to know)? Jack is waving things in front of his eyes to see "how your pupils respond to changing stimuli." Also? "I think you should just shut up and relax." And then Jack pulls out his handy clipboard, I swear, and starts asking Very Important Medical Questions: "You ever had a blood transfusion?" "No!" "Pills for malaria?" "No." "Sex with a prostitute?" Sawyer squirms. "What the hell's that got to do with anything?" "Is that a yes?" That's a yes. Which raises the question: on which planet does Sawyer have to pay for it? (Eh. Maybe she was off-duty at the time...?) Kate is way too amused by this, given the personal stake she may or may not have in Sawyer's sexual health, I might add. "Ever had a sexually transmitted disease?" That's another silent yes. "When was the last outbreak--" "YOU GO TO HELL, DOC!" shouts Sawyer, and storms off. Seriously, he's really, really
pretty mad. Maybe because Jack was making him look icky in front of Kate, specifically? Kate's laughing, by the way. "I know he deserved it, but--" "Glasses," Jack breaks in. "He needs glasses." HA!
Back in the jungle, Locke's legs are giving out. Locke blames it on the shrapnel injury from the trebuchet, but Boone points out that the shrapnel hit his right leg--"What's wrong with your left?" And then Locke collapses. Boone wants to drag him back to Jack, but Locke insists that Jack "wouldn't know the first thing about what's wrong with me." "What is wrong with you?" And, to my amazement, Locke actually tells him: "I was in a wheelchair... paralyzed for four years. I was in the wheelchair on the plane when we took off... but not after we crashed." "Why?" asks Boone. "It doesn't matter anymore," says Locke. "This island changed me, it made me whole, and now it's trying to take it back, I don't know why... But it wants me to follow what I saw. Something that we were meant to find! We gotta keep going!" Boone seems sympathetic. But he is also totally giving Locke the look of Humoring the Crazy. "Can you move your legs?" he asks, and Locke says, "Just help me up, son." So Boone is basically going to drag him through the jungle on his shoulder. Greaaaaat.
Flashback. Locke and Papa de Locke, who is wearing a fetching black dictator beret, hunt doves. I have to think that's symbolic, so... go to town with it, kids. Papa de Locke's all, "Good shot, son!" And then he does the whole "I'm so glad your crazy, crazy mother brought us together... while we still have time" thing. So smarmy, so fake... so much hate.
Suddenly (back in the present), Boone blurts out, "She was my nanny. Theresa. Mom wasn't around much, so I took it out on her. I'd sit in my bedroom all day calling her on the intercom. One day she took a bad step, broke her neck. I was six." And so help me, Locke LAUGHS. "What the hell is so funny!" demands Boone, but all Locke can do is point: the plane! the plane!
"Is that the plane you saw?" "As best I can tell," says Locke. And it really is the yellow plane, so far as we know. "How long do you think it's been there?" asks Boone. "Doesn't matter. What's important is that we found it, and what's inside it. You're gonna have to climb up there and find out." Ohhhhhhhhhh good. Boone keeps looking back over at Locke, like--dude, no, he can't climb. It's gonna have to be you.
(Is it awfully convenient that the island would "take away" Locke's ability to walk when a dangerous situation came up? You be the judge. I'm just saying.)
Flashback: Locke and Papa de Locke in matching hospital beds. Oh no. "You sure you don't want to change your mind?" asks the old guy. "Nah," says Locke. "They already shaved my back." Awww! And ew. "I'm so thankful for you, John," smarms Papa de Locke. "This was meant to be." The whole thing is frickin' dodgy, y'all. "See you on the other side, son."
Jack's dad is so totally the surgeon of record on this one, isn't he?
Back over in Sawyerland, Jack approaches with a box. "If you're looking for a stool sample, you can forget it," grumps Sawyer. "You read a lot," says Jack. "You've got hyperopia." I am serious, y'all, Sawyer looks like he's about to burst into tears. It's both really sad and really funny, the way he's so manfully trying to cope with this dread diagnosis: "That's... what is that?" "You're far-sighted," says Jack. He pulls out THE dorkiest black Poindexter glasses ever. "Blurry," pronounces Sawyer, trying them on. Here's a stylish pair of old-lady tortoiseshells: "NO WAY." "Sawyer, it's not a fashion show," says Jack. You know he's loving this. I can't wait for the cruel nicknames, myself.
Ooooo, Sayid! Soak it up, because this is his only appearance tonight, and he doesn't even get to speak. He's soldering and melting things and... wait, what is he doing? He can't actually lenscraft, can he? Ah. He's concocted--a half-Poindexter, half-tortoiseshell pair for Sawyer. Eeeeeee hee hee! "You look like somebody steamrollered Harry Potter!" crows Hurley. Kate makes snarky faces of approval. Sawyer dies of embarrassment. Ah, the price he done paid for the book-learnin'.
Meanwhile, Boone is scaling a dark and scary treeroot-covered cliff to get to the little yellow plane. He manages to crawl inside and, after shrieking and flailing at a desiccated corpse, shouts down to Locke, "You wanna know what's in your damn plane? Here's your sign!" He throws down a Virgin Mary figurine, which shatters on the ground at Locke's feet to reveal... little baggies of... "HEROIN! THAT'S ALL THAT'S IN HERE!" Oh shit. Ohhhhhhh shit. This is so not good news for Charlie. Locke's freaking out back on the ground, just repeating over and over, "I don't understand! I don't understand!" Boone, meanwhile, is actually being useful for once (I know!) and manages to get a signal on the radio, which magically still works after 2-10 years (as the polyester decomposes), even as the plane is starting to slip out of the trees. "Boone! Boone, get out! BOONE, THERE'S NO TIME!" But Boone's actually managed to get someone on the radio: "Hello! Hello! Can you hear me! We're the survivors of Oceanic Flight 815!" And then the voice on the other end (apparently) says, "There were no survivors of Oceanic Flight 815!" And then the plane takes a dive.
Now, I have to say here that I've decreased my spoiler consumption considerably, but I (like many of y'all) had heard that someone was going to die, no, really this time, and it would be a guy, and various other clues ruled out Sawyer (Josh Holloway said the doomed actor was a good friend--therefore, not Holloway himself), Locke (because Locke had something to do with the character's death), and Charlie ("The fans would kill us. We will never kill Charlie"). Also, the character would be "popular" and "good-looking," which doesn't really narrow it down, but okay. Oh, and it would be a character whose storyline wasn't really advancing. You put all of this together, and what do you get? Boone. But I wasn't expecting it to happen until the very last possible moment--maybe the last or second-to-last show of the season. So right here, the plane falls flat on its nose with Boone in the cockpit, and I start shrieking. Locke flails himself over to the plane and pulls him out--and so far, Boone's bloody and mangled, but still blinking. Oh, and his arm looks horrifically broken, from what I could tell. So Locke slings him over his shoulder and makes for camp, and--hey, look at that: Locke's pretty steady on his feet now, isn't he?
So right in the middle of this, we go to a lighthearted scene with Kate thanking Jack for helping Sawyer, and Jack's all like, "I didn't do it for him," and Kate smiles shyly, and PEOPLE! WHAT THE HELL! Finally the flirting is broken up by Locke shouting for Jack. "There was an accident," he says. "Boone fell off a cliff while we were hunting." Jack looks at him like, "What the fuck?" Kate makes tragic grossed-out faces. Boone looks really, really bad--Jack's calling for rags and towels and boiling water (wait, no--that's for delivering babies in movies, sorry), and Boone seems to be pretty badly mangled around the midsection. "Tell me exactly what happened," says Jack, but then he realizes that Locke is gone: "John? LOCKE? LOCKE!"
Flashback: Locke wakes up in the hospital, but Papa de Locke's bed is empty and made. "I think what you did was so kind," says a nearby nurse. Uh-oh. Locke asks where his father is ("Oh, I didn't know he was your father"), and it turns out that "Mr. Cooper checked out this afternoon, and is at home under private care." Locke's all like, "Wha...?" And no, Papa de Locke left no message for him.
"It was his idea!" says Crazily from the doorway. All y'all who called kidney donor scam when the dialysis machine showed up, collect your money now. But apparently Crazily and Papa de Locke really are his parents; it's just that Crazily needed money, so they set it up so that Locke would go find his father on his own (nothing lights a fire under your paternity search like "immaculate conception," I tell you what), and the kidney thing would seem like Locke's own idea. "He asked me to go see you. And I wanted to see you!" Locke starts freaking out: "This can't be happening. This is a misunderstanding. This can't happen to me! He wouldn't do this to me! You wouldn't do this to me!" I'm really intrigued by his wording here, but I don't know what to make of it.
Casa Cooper. "Mr. Cooper's not seeing guests. I'm sorry, John," says Eddie the guard. Locke gets out of his car, and you can see blood on his back from the fresh surgical incision--leaking through the bandages, I guess, in his agitation. I have typed in my notes, Y'all, this is gonna be so bad. I was expecting just about anything at this point--Eddie's asking Locke to move his car and Locke won't do it, and I was so expecting someone to shoot Locke for "trespassing" or something. Or for him to try to ram his car into the gates. Or something, anything, that would end up paralyzing him. Now Locke's prowling back and forth outside the gate, yelling at the security camera: "I know you're there! You can't do this!"
But Locke does leave, and he manages not to get shot or wrecked or crushed or anything. And then (he runs off the road?) he starts slamming the ceiling of his car (and runs into a pole?) and stops the car (and gets hit by oncoming traffic?) and just sits there and hits things (and breaks his stitches?) and freaks out for a while. I'm pretty sure the music from the big "I can walk!" scene at the end of "Walkabout" is playing here, or something very like it, because I'm having the same emotional reaction to it all over again. But nothing else catastrophic happens.
Well, except for the whole getting Boone mostly killed thing. Now Locke's out in the jungle, in the dark, weeping and beating on the hatch: "I've done everything you wanted me to do, so why did you do this! Why! WHY!" and then A LIGHT COMES ON INSIDE THE HATCH OH MY GOD.
Previews: Jack: "You are not gonna die. I am gonna save you." Shannon weeps. Kate: "Claire? What are you doing out here? Oh God, you're having the baby." Charlie: "You have to deliver the baby!" Claire: "I'm so scared!" Boone: "Let me go, Jack." Jack: "I'm not gonna let you go!" (Jack: *lets go.* Sorry--inevitable Titanic joke.)