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Please close the door and switch on the fun without fail.

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Wow, I am ranty today
msauvage purple

The weather is gorgeous and golden and cold, and I'm going to wash my hair and push forward with NaNo. I think part of my problem earlier was that I was trying to start at the beginning and force my way through, and that has never, ever worked for me. So I'm going to try to see what I can get written up from later in the story and add that to my word count.

My mother wants to go see a movie on Sunday, but I don't know that there's another one out that she'd want to see. I'm trying to figure out if this is a gambit on her part to go see The Prestige again or what.

Letters to God end up in ocean, unread. The title just struck me as something so sad and beautiful. And then the end of the article made me sick.

U.S. needs "sexual literacy" - ex-surgeon generals: "U.S. efforts to promote abstinence as a cornerstone of sexual education have not lowered levels of sexually transmitted diseases, two former U.S. surgeon generals said on Thursday." GOD, abstinence-only education pisses me off. It's like refusing to teach kids to drive and then saying, "Now, kids, cars are bad! Don't get in any cars!" "But there's no public transportation in this town--" "Bye, kids! Stay safe and out of cars!" The essence of futility, in other words. They're going to "get in cars" anyway, and now they don't even know what they're doing. (I'm sure it's a flawed analogy, but work with me here.) And here's another thought, genius: okay, so they don't have sex until they're married. What happens after they're married? They still don't know what they're doing! I'm not saying I want y'all to issue the Kama Sutra as a textbook, but there is no excuse for young married women who think that you can't get pregnant while breastfeeding. There are entire message boards and LJ communities dedicated to letting girls ask the dumbest questions EVER about pregnancy and their bodies because YOU WON'T TEACH THEM. "Well, the parents should educate their children!" What if the parents also had abstinence-only sex education? I mean, yes, I feel like parents should be saying, "This is what sex is, respect yourself and wait for someone who cares about you," but there's a lot of things that a lot of people have managed not to learn--or be taught. That's why people go to school, so that they can partake of knowledge, where the teachers have textbooks and videos and visual aids and up-to-date facts and figures. There are things you should be teaching kids about sex, disease, pregnancy and responsibility, and "Don't do it" isn't going to cover it. (/rant)

Kanye West sore loser at MTV Europe Awards. But I think his rant was actually shorter than mine up there.

Miss Great Britain stripped of title for dating one of the judges. The best part is, the article seems to be saying that she was chirping on about shoes the guy got her for Christmas, and people went, "Wait, you said you didn't start dating him until the pageant started in FEBRUARY."

More Chuck. I'm thinking the Armstrongs should take this show on the road.

Rumor: Michael Hoffman to [possibly] direct Half-Blood Prince. Who? "Director of A Midsummer Night's Dream, Restoration and Soapdish." I'm telling you, every directorial choice after Cuarón, who at least had done A Little Princess in addition to being totally awesome, has made progressively less sense. The guy who did Four Weddings and a Funeral? Sure! How about the guy who did The Girl in the Cafe? Clearly experienced with fantasy movies and young actors! By the time we get to Harry Potter and the Blah of the Blee, we're gonna be down to some newbie they found at a film festival.

Actually, we'll probably be back to Chris Columbus, because I've heard rumblings that he wants to come back for the last one. There are two kinds of Potter movie fans, and neither one understands the other, so I'll try to be as objective here as possible, but I will probably fail: there are people who prefer the Columbus movies, with their vivid Christmas-colored cinematography (I can't think of any other way to explain it. The first two movies just remind me of Christmas) and slavish attention to book accuracy, and there are people who prefer Cuarón's and/or Newell's adaptations on the grounds that they're more visually inventive and the kids are better directed. I'm in the latter camp. And yes, I will admit up front that some of the changes to the geography of the sets were arbitrary and confusing, and that some key pieces of information were left out of both movies that left casual viewers scratching their heads. And no, I'm not sure why Dumbledore went all shouty in Goblet of Fire, either. But the fact is that time seems to slow to a crawl in Columbus's adaptations (which, hey, if you don't ever want your Potter movie to end, might be a good thing), to the point where the second half of Chamber of Secrets saps my entire will to live. I don't think I could sit through a Columbus-directed version of the final book, and, quite frankly, I don't think he has the dramatic chops for it. Both the books and the movies seem to age with the character, to the point where the series began, whether Rowling intended it or not, with a children's book. But it's not going to end with one--it's going to be young adult at the very least. For most of his career, Columbus has directed children's movies and broad comedies. The current Potter movies are beyond him. (No, Rent does not change my mind.)

So, if I'm so wise, who should direct the last two movies? I don't know. I'm beyond suggesting Gilliam, because it finally occurred to me that it would be the biggest fiasco ever. If the man--who's been plagued with studio interference all his career--can't even make the frickin' Brothers Grimm without getting shit from the corporate office, can you imagine the war zone that a Harry Potter movie would be? Books would be written about it. I'm also beyond hoping Cuarón comes back, because I linked my general Prisoner of Azkaban review on the POA/15M, and people are STILL arguing on that entry two years later. And the anti-Cuarón camp is still very, very angry (which is only fair, I guess, because I get very, very angry about Columbus). There's probably someone who's good at drawing mature performances out of young actors, juggling large casts and multiple storylines, knowing what to cut and what to keep, and dealing with an anxious studio. I just don't know who it is. I don't even think Peter Jackson would be a good idea--I don't think he'd be able to come in on the end of someone else's series and bat cleanup, plus he likes his gore too much. I'm sure there's someone who fits the bill; I just don't know who it is.

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I completely 100% agree about Cuarón, for I am in that designated "camp" you speak of. I want him to come back. Seriously. Bring him back. Now.

Ditto. I was perusing a friend-of-a-friend's blog the other day, and in an entry about the franchise, she said, "Like many folk, I think the third movie, directed by Curon [sic], was the worst of the lot." It was all I could do not to comment and get into a big debate with some girl I hardly know. But damn, I love that movie. It's the only HP movie I own, and it's almost perfect. (The one complaint I have is that the origin of the Marauder's Map was never explained.)

I agree about the letters to God/the minister: the end was sickening. Those poor people.

Let's see...people hurting, in pain, sending these letters hoping God will hear them...ooh, EBAY!


Complete agreeance. How someone's train of thought runs those tracks? I'll never know.

Unrelated: ICONLOVE. <3 Scrubs.

Bless you, I didn't know we could follow the *normal* way of writing novels with NaNoWriMo, the only way to actually write something, going back and forth on the chapters... I may just start now then :p

That Letters To God story... I'm hoping something happens to change that ending...

I figure you can write any damn way you want to, so long as you come up with 50,000 words. Hell, I figure you don't even have to finish the story, if the story ends up being more than you can write in 50,000 words and a month. It's easier to keep up with the word count if you write straight through, I suppose--well, if you're like me and you have several contradicting sets of notes and sketches. But there's no reason to limit yourself (I'm telling myself) with unnecessary restrictions.

Hmmm. I wouldn't have recognized Michael Hoffman's name either, but I never fail to giggle at Soapdish and positively adore Restoration.

So, the guy finds the letters ... meant to be placed on an altar, and read by a minster, which assumes they wanted this information private, and he's going to sell them on ebay ...

There should be a special level of hell for that. Not to mention, the reporter has obviously had access to this private correspondence as well. SIGH.

"Well, the parents should educate their children!" What if the parents also had abstinence-only sex education?

Exactly! About three years ago, my father had to give The Talk to a colleague who was (1) raised as a devout Christian and (2) about to get married to a likewise devout and clueless young woman. This was a twenty-something Coast Guardsman (I think he was a petty officer or a chief warrant officer) who had to be told how Tab A fits into Slot 1.

OMG. Do you watch The Office? There's a great deleted scene where an office worker asks the HR person where the clitoris is and, if the books say near the vagina, "Does that mean on the leg?"

Hi Cleo! I've been lurking for a while now and finally got around to getting my very own LJ. I added you to my friends list. I hope that was ok. :0)

Of course! Welcome aboard. : )

[Grammar Nazi] Dear article: It's surgeons general! [/Grammar Nazi]

But man, am I glad I don't live in the US. I know there was an episode of The West Wing that had the quote along the lines of, "Teaching abstinence has a 100% failure rate," and you'd think that if the whole no-sex schtick is going so wrong, someone would get the bright idea to go, "Hey, wait a second - this ain't working. Let's do something about it." buuut then that's probably not gonna happen because of the Republicans and bible-thumpers.

Maybe people should move to Canada instead.

Personally, I wish Spielberg would have one of his restless moments, and take it; he certainly wouldn't be afraid of the darker material. (In my madder moments, I vote for John Hughes. Hmm... perhaps the Chronicles of Narnia guy?)

And, a dark horse candidate? Rob Reiner. His work has been erratic as HELL lately, but anyone who could direct Stand By Me, Princess Bride AND Misery can certainly handle Rowling.

Oh god, don't get me started on Sex Ed - I went to CATHOLIC school. There WAS no sex ed, seriously. The only reason I learned about sex was because in 6th grade I did a chapter in science class on Plant Reproduction, and it suddenly occured to my mother to ask me, "...You do know how humans reproduce, right?" It was never mentioned in any of my classes, either in health or religion class.

Aw, now I'm all pissed again.

That's gotta suck. I went to a Catholic gradeschool and high school, and they both did a good job with sex ed. (Although in gradeschool it was after hours in case your parents didn't want you going.)

Phooey on stupid parents. =^n.n^=

Here are some folks I would love to see get a crack at a Potter movie that never will: Richard Kelly, Peter Berg, Sofia Coppola, Sam Mendes. Barring that, I'd say bring back Cuaron as well.

I'm doing the "rock" horns over your sex-ed rant, just fyi.

Sofia Coppola

That would be fabulous.

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(Seriously. They totally went there, threatening us with stretch marks.)

Very pragmatic, that. Right up there with the old "SMOKING IS VERY GLAMOROUS" posters, with the picture of some scary old hag taking a drag.

With your typical teenage girl, the spectre of any form of disfigurement is quite probably the most effective deterrent available!

When HBC was cast as Bellatrix, I was like, "Hmm, it might be interesting to let Tim Burton direct one of these." Peter Jackson is too busy thinking of new ways to repackage all the leftover LotR footage. Andrew Adamson is a Kiwi, though. Hahahaha.

I sort of like the idea of Tim Burton directing Harry Potter. It could only be as bad as the fiasco that was his </i>Willy Wonka</i>, and most of Rowling's main characters already have daddy issues, so...