Also: WELCOME, KNITTERS OF THE INTERNETS. PLEASE ENJOY THIS BASKET OF COMPLIMENTARY YARNS.
More from the Summer Olympics, which still has no froofy costumes, but I understand had some carnage in the weightlifting competition today AND NO I AM NOT LINKING IT, BECAUSE JUST HEARING ABOUT IT MADE ME WANT TO DIE: from blinkliz, Olympic opening uses girl's voice, not face; from iamshadow, One of Britain's divers is kind of a jerk; from the Associated Press, Phelps becomes winningest Olympic athlete ever. This headline is 100% real, y'all. Also: The Spanish basketball team displays epic stupidity.
livelongnmarry, "a charity fandom auction to help keep same-sex marriage legal in California (and help make it legal everywhere), has officially raised over $50k" and received the thanks of a grateful George Takei.
Martian Statue Permanently Terrorizes Small English Town.
Steve Jobs Confirms iPhone Has a Kill Switch. Sinister!
Janes in Love: graphic novel is a call-to-art for young people.
Feature: "Jean-Paul Sartre's Script for 'Without a Trace.'"
When you sleep, do you dream about pop culture? Dude, when am I not dreaming about pop culture?
EXCLUSIVE: MTV VMAs Host Russell Brand Takes the Defamer Pop Culture Test. "Amy [Winehouse] has been on several of my television shows in the United Kingdom. She's a very talented and beautiful girl and in my house, to this day, I have a Mexican doll that for a while lived in her hair." Brand also explains exactly what happened with the Christian Bale thing last month: "In England, we have such good manners that if someone says something impolite, the police will get involved. Christian Bale, I believe whilst in a restaurant, rolled his eyes at the lighting. That is an offense punishable by five years in prison in the United Kingdom. I admire Christian Bale and I think he's one of the greatest living actors on the planet currently, but we cannot shirk when it comes to good manners. If it's true that he also dropped a napkin on his way to the lavatory, then I think that he should possibly receive the death penalty."
Win a Threesome with Scarlett Johansson!
Don Cheadle on list of spectacular women. ... What?
Washington Post Offends Jonas Brothers Fans, Bitchily Apologizes.
Elvis and Priscilla emerge as Barbies; Will Elvis get a Barbie ‘Heartbreak Hotel,’ too?
Tonner's Will Turner doll finally appears. It is... kind of weird looking. And yet, probably more butch than Actual Will Turner.
At the movies, funny is where you find it. This is a man after my own heart.
Freemanic Paracusia. I have this problem sometimes, actually.
'Maid in Manhattan' Coming to the Small Screen. You know what? Bring it. It could not possibly be worse than the movie itself.
MST3K's Joel Hodgson returns with 'Cinematic Titanic.'
Toronto Adds Premieres for 'Che', 'Porno', 'Bloom', 'Synecdoche', Others.
Images: Hi-res McCoy, Sulu, Scotty and Chekov 'Star Trek' Posters; 'Ghost Town' Poster Sees Dead People, Like That One Movie.
Trailers and clips: Bernie Mac And Isaac Hayes Remembered In ‘Soul Men’ Clips; New 'Body of Lies' Trailer Hits (is this one any less vague than the one that ran in theaters last month?); Watch The Craziest Scenes From Death Race, Chuck, Knight Rider, Heroes And Sarah Connor [Morning Spoilers]; The Once-Great Jonathan Demme's Cold Streak Continues With 'Rachel Getting Married' (what happened there, y'all?).
The juggernaut of Twilight Crazy is slowing down, woe: Growing Up Cullen icons! From spectralbovine: Twilight trailer spoof! casirafics reports from one of the Breaking Dawn reading/concerts, lives to tell tale! 'Twilight' Lexicon Blog Hacked By 'Breaking Dawn' Haters! Yes, this is an actual article on the MTV blog. Also: Twilight Could be Six Movies. I'm not sure what math this guy is doing--it's the same "Breaking Dawn could/should be two movies" item everyone else is reporting, except now it's all like, "The series could be six or seven movies!" Okay, look, at least be accurate: it's four books, with one of them in two parts (that she is wanting, not necessarily getting), which makes three plus two, which equals five. Not "six or seven." Unless you'd just like to go around flailing that it could be NINETEEN OR TWENTY MOVIES OH MY GOOOOOOD IT MUST BE STOPPED! Because I might join you on that one.
Tropic Thundergate: Commentary: 'Tropic Thunder' shouldn't be seen; Commentary: 'Thunder' critics missing the point; ‘Thunder’ mocks Hollywood racial profiling (I like the "DUH " tone of this headline); Jim Emerson Smacks Down 'Tropic' Boycotters; Ben Stiller And Jack Black Draw Clear Line Between Movie Retardation/ Flatulence And The Real Thing [Retardalypse Now] (okay, see, that's exactly how I was trying not to phrase it).
Tropic Thunder reviews: ‘Tropic Thunder’ will crack you up; Review: 'Tropic Thunder' has some strong laughs; 'Tropic Thunder' rolls with laughter; 'Tropic Thunder': the EW review (grade: A). These are just the reviews that have come up on my blog feeds; if I see any bad ones, they'll get posted, too. I don't really have a stake in the quality of this movie or anything.
Is There Really a Gay Hutt in 'Star Wars: The Clone Wars'?; Capote-Sounding 'Star Wars' Character Only As Gay As You Want Him to Be.
'The Dark Knight' no longer #1 on IMDB reader poll; Morgan Freeman still king of film.
Geraldine Somerville Confirms Return as Lily Potter for "Deathly Hallows."
James Franco Ready To Sign On For ‘Hills’ Movie As Justin Bobby?; James Franco Has a Prosthetic Penis in Gus Van Sant's 'Milk'?! Does he? I got as far as "Oh, my God, I'm kissing Spicoli" and had to go die laughing somewhere.
Oscar Watch: 'The Duchess' Costume Party; 'The Duchess' in Vogue.
Universal Acquires Jordan's 'Wheel of Time.'
Dafoe and Gainsbourg Face 'Antichrist' for Lars von Trier.
O'Connor, Lionsgate Team for 'Warrior.'
Justin Theroux Promises 'Iron Man 2' Script With 100 Percent Less Batdrama [Feuds]; Iron Man Meets His End In November.
Lionsgate's Conan Movie on the Fast Track with New Writers.
Will There Ever Be a ‘Serenity’ Sequel? Joss Whedon Puts the Rumors To Bed.
Pixar Teams Up With Boom! For Comic Spin-Offs.
Cruise, Spyglass in Talks for 'The Tourist.'
Joel Silver, 'Rocknrolla' Among the Inventory on Display at Warner Bros. Fire Sale [Everything Must Go].
The Batman Story Chris Nolan Won't Ever Adapt [Found Footage]; The Worst Superhero Cartoon You've Never Seen [Daredevil].
Swank Adapting 'French Women Don't Get Fat'; Trashionista's take on making the book into a movie: "Er, how?"; 'French Women Don't Get Fat' and 'Freaky Friday 2': Two Movies I'll Never See.
Great Literary Novel Becomes A Slapstick Bikini Movie ['Possibility Of An Island'].
Brett Ratner Wants to Produce a 'Mother's Day' Remake? (Really?)
Don't Let This 'Fireproof' Poster Get 'Left Behind'! (WINK!); Kirk Cameron's 'Fireproof' Keeps Getting Better and Better.
Ridiculous 'Spirit' Scene Leaks Online; Not Even Samuel L. Jackson In Terrible Eyeliner Can Save 'The Spirit'; 10 Comics Creators We Wish Would Make Movies Instead Of Frank Miller.
What should get the Uwe Boll Really Bad Movie of Badness Slot today?
Anything involving Brett Ratner
Anything involving Kirk Cameron
Anything involving a pointless remake
Anything involving a pointless sequel
Anything involving slapstick bikinis
Not 'The Spirit,' Samuel L. Jackson will hurt us