Cleolinda Jones (cleolinda) wrote,
Cleolinda Jones
cleolinda

I can't believe I'm doing this

Okay, look. I can't be at the computer a whole lot and I can post links even less, particularly since I'm cleaning madly for the lunchtime electricians, but we have got to get a few things out of the way because this is the subject of half my inbox this morning:

Yes, I have seen the sparklecock. Yes, you too can now own your own unofficially Twilight-themed glitter dildo. Well, technically I haven't looked at it yet, although I have read the description ("THROW IT IN THE FRIDGE FOR THAT AUTHENTIC EXPERIENCE"?), because I am on the family computer and I will never, ever be able to explain this.

And yes, Edward's life-size shadow can watch you while you use it.

Excuse me, I have to go bleach my mind's eye now.


(Also, Amazon's Tonner prom exclusive Bella has her own little leg cast. Apparently the doll's product name--the way the SDCC Edward exclusive was "Hungry"--is "Turn Me." I... I really don't like thinking about all three of these items being in the same room.)



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Tags: actual sparkle motion, dolls, i am never making it up, scary, sex, tonner, twilight, why god why, wtf
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  • HELLO

    I have not checked in for a while! Also I'm so used to Twitter that I totally forgot about comments here and I NEED TO CHECK THOSE OMG. I saw a…

  • So Surprise Gender Swap Twilight was a thing that happened

    I may write an overall summary later, but for now, here is the complete livetweet/discussion (seven days over two weeks) of Twilight Reimagined:…

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