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Occupation: Girl

Please close the door and switch on the fun without fail.

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Many things to discuss
msauvage purple
Many things! So many that I only culled the very best links for the spam, and it's still hugelong. Well, it's not that bad. JUST READ IT.

To begin: the new Made of Fail, "Self-Esteem is for Everybody," is up. I'm not on it (Scarlett is of Scarlettopia and the Spoony Experiment is, much to Dayna's twitterpation), but Dayna and I were talking a few days before, and she had me write down what I was saying so she could read it on air (about 28 minutes in), and it was: my advice to geek boys. My sad, hard-won, somewhat embittered advice. Alas, earwax.

Also, the Christopher Pike thing just got better. (Scroll down to "ETA again.") Not only is he now accusing caligirl_08 of being the one with an army of Amazon review sockpuppets, he's claiming that bookfails is "a livejournal community sponsored by someone of Turkish background who has taken things much too far and is trying to rob fiction authors of their artistic license." Such artistic license includes claiming that the Aryans of India are the same as the "Nordic ideal" Aryans.

However: sad news as well.

Hollywood legend Tony Curtis dies at 85. 

Bonnie and Clyde Director Arthur Penn Dies at 88.

'Marty,' 'Chinatown' actor Joe Mantell dies at 94.

More linkspam:

It's Official: Christopher Nolan Will Direct 'Batman 3.' My understanding is that the holdup was that Nolan wasn't sure he wanted to do it, not that anyone at the studio would have dreamed of going anywhere else. I mean, in addition to the emotional issues surrounding the second movie--how in the world is he supposed to top that? I'd take a couple of years off, too. Meanwhile: Michael Caine Gives Possible Batman Start; Michael Caine explains the end of Inception.

Three Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows - Part 1 Banners. 

Johnny Depp On The Set Of ‘Pirates Of The Caribbean: On Stranger Tides’; 'The Lone Ranger' to Reunite Johnny Depp with 'Pirates' Director Gore Verbinski.

Today in Predictable Things: George Lucas Converting Star Wars Saga to 3-D.

NBC and Bryan Fuller remaking 'The Munsters.'

US Networks May Board ITV ‘Titanic.’

‘Girl with a Dragon Tattoo’: Christopher Plummer to play Henrik Vanger. 

Jared Harris to play Moriarty in Sherlock Holmes 2.

Mission: Impossible Adds Josh Holloway; Mission: Impossible to Film in DubaiHelp Movieline Caption New Tom Cruise Photo from the Set of 4th Mission Impossible.

Natalie Portman Now Starring in 'Gravity', Alfonso Cuaron's Sci-Fi Epic; 'Superman' Reboot to Find Natalie Portman Playing Lois Lane?

Stewart Circling Dreamworks Thriller Someone in the Dark.

Don't Look the Trailer for Skyline in the Eyes Unless You Want Aliens to Kill You; The I Am Number Four Trailer: Twilight With Aliens. I thought that was "Roswell"?

EXCL: Davis, Mulcahy Push the Envelope with Teen Wolf.

Strangers on a Train Re-Imaginged for Teens. Of course it is.

'Snow White' Adds Another Dark, Survival Story to Her Pile of Upcoming Adaptations.

Jesse Eisenberg vs. Michael Cera: Avoiding Slacker Burnout. You know, people keep saying, "So this kid always plays the same character--so what? So do actors X, Y and Z!" But you know, I've figured it out: it's that, this time around, I'm not interested in that one character. Some people are; I'm not. So. There you are.

'Sex and the City' is Dead, and Chris Noth is Blaming the Critics. 

Avatar porn trailer reveals the Na'vi-human war over male sexual enhancement.

'Rubber' Review: The Fantastic Fest Film That Gives New Meaning to "Tire Trouble." "The film opens with our eponymous tire becoming aware of its abilities to blow stuff up and roll around."

Krackoon Trailer: Because What the World Needs Now is a Crack-Addicted Raccoon Splatter Flick. YES.

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'Sex and the City' is Dead, and Chris Noth is Blaming the Critics.

Where can I send these critics a fruit basket?

^THIS! I was just about to ask if I was the only one thinking, "YEAH! GO CRITICS!"

seriously, WHY are they still making POTC films? i didn't really care for any of them after the first one, to be honest.

i had no idea about tony curtis! *single tear* i loved him in some like it hot.

i am very excited to see how jesse eisenberg does in the social network. i'm hoping this film is worth the hype.

because some people (like me) loved all 3 of them

Lindy West not only equated the film to gay men playing with Barbies, but stated: "If this is what modern womanhood means, then just f**king veil me and sew up all my holes."

Is it possible to actually die from trying not to laugh out loud at work? Should I call 911 just in case?

I think one of my eyeballs just popped out.

That line made me laugh so hard I scared the dog!

Oh second thought, though... it might be a little xenophobic. The bit about the veil, I mean, not the holes.

Natalie Portman playing Lois Lane?

No NO NO!!!

:( what's wrong with poor natalie portman?

i thought she is a brilliant actress in films like V for Vendetta

and she would fit the sort of image created by smallville louise lane, except a softer look.

Don't forget the trailer for ROBOT! Indian cinema meets Terminator movies.

Enthiran is going to be the crackiest crack that ever cracked.

That Christopher Pike story is hilarious. It's one of the better author wanks I've read. And to think it started off as the initial post in unfunny_fandom.

Jared Harris as Moriarty is almost as exciting to me as Stephen Fry as Mycroft. And by 'almost' I mean 'OH MY GOD OH MY GOD STEPHEN FRY' as opposed to 'oh, I quite like that guy'. ;)

I LOVE him as Lane Pryce on Mad Men, this news genuinely made me squee.

Greg Giraldo also passed away, unfortunately.

I don't have an emoticon sad enough for this.

I recently learned about a Japanese latex fetish movie called Rubber, and for a second I thought that last link was referring to something REALLY different before I remembered the evil tire movie.

Further thoughts on the Sherlock casting?

part of the Nolan hang up was that the studio wants the next movie in 3D and he was trying to fight them on it.

Let's all just cross our fingers and hope that he wins that fight.


Seriously. Maybe there's a chance now that Inception made a squillion or two and didn't have the whole "Batman!" thing going for it, they'll listen to him.

I love you. You've brought joy to my morning. I'd be lost in life without knowing about THIS TIRE MOVIE.

No seriously, I have to see it to feel like my life is complete.

*crosses fingers for Gravity* Because damn the world needs more good sci-fi and not just all this "Let's blow everything up acton sci-fi".

Also, this Christopher Pike thing just keeps getting better and better. Thank you, Mr. Pike, for proving that male vampire writers are just as bugfuck insane as the women.

I thought I was the only Gay man on the planet who loathed SEX & THE CITY with a passion. Turns out there are about 13 of us. Of course, Headquarters is hunting us, but it's worth it...

Jared Harris? They should have stuck with Brad Pitt.

I can't stand Michael Cera, but I want to do naughty, naughty things to Jesse Eisenberg. He's like a version of Cera that's been left in the oven a bit longer, until he got talent and personality...

RUBBER sounds glorious...

Christopher Plummer in anything makes me happy. I've been in love with him since I first watched the sound of music when I was six.

There was a TSOM vid in Vividcon this year (actually, there were two, but I think one was older), and we were watching it recently with friends, and we all just sort of sighed and said, "Man, Christopher Plummer was unreasonably HOT in that thing, wasn't he."

Not Tony Curtis... :(
the world is now a little less awesome