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Occupation: Girl

Please close the door and switch on the fun without fail.

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Because I think it really comes down to this
msauvage purple
So today is Spirit Day. I don't really have any purple to wear, nor anyone to see me wearing it. Bullying has been pretty exhaustively discussed on the internets the last few weeks (although I liked this post the best); I don't really want to get into any of the hows and whys. I was mildly tormented throughout my entire grade-school career, not nothing near as bad as a lot of people had to endure. And the one thing I've figured out from that experience, for absolute sure, is that bullying is able to happen when good people do nothing.

So it doesn't really matter to me what "reason" bullies decide on when they start picking on you. They don't think you're the "right" gender, the right orientation, the right color, the right size; I don't really care. What I'm telling you now is that I'm not going to just stand here anymore. Everyone always says, "Well, it's none of my business." Bullying will be my business now. If I see someone giving you shit, I will tell them to cut that shit out, and we'll take it from there. And if you aren't the one being bullied, and you're standing next to me, I hope you'll back me up. I hope you would do the same for me.

That's my contribution today.

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I actually got a friend request from one of my most hated bullies, and promptly deleted it. I'd heard about how her life turned out, and damned if she didn't deserve it, cruel bitch.

I admit I almost went off the deep end when I overheard a couple of girls in my son's preschool(!) class calling him names, and one asking the other one if Michael was "Reallllly [her] friend?" Fortunately he didn't hear them, but I stepped in and said, very nicely but pointedly, "Girls, we don't say mean things about our friends or talk about them when they aren't there. It isn't nice, and you wouldn't want them to do that to you, right?" One girl was kind of ashamed, the other was defiant. My husband thinks I almost crossed a line by rebuking someone else's kid, but damn, someone had to, and the teacher didn't hear it. Nip that shit in the bud early, I say.

I don't think you crossed the line in what you said. You were firm, but not nasty. I know if I had kids my first duty would be to protect them then try to help other parents by gently guiding their children when they weren't around.
Then again, I was bullied mercilessly due to my accent and my social class and I wish some other parents had stepped in on my behalf.

Thanks, and I agree that one of the worst things I've seen is other parents idly watching or at worst, completely ignoring, cruel behavior in other children. Either their own or other people's. As *adults* you have a responsiblity to protect those that cannot protect themselves - even if it's from your own child. As Mr. Bennett says "If my own children are silly, I hope always to be sensible of it."

You did the right thing. I think kids who bully often have no idea how bad their behavior is--they need to be taught. When I went to my H.S. reunion I spoke to some people who'd bullied me and they didn't seem to have any idea that their behavior was wrong or harmful. It was an eye-opener because it felt so horrible and personal at the time, but I think it was just thoughtless cruelty. And if an adult had stepped and cut it off in the way you did it, maybe it would've made them think about what they were doing.

Honestly, I have no problem schooling someone else's kid. A lot of parents today don't, and I wouldn't want my child to have to suffer someone else's bad parenting choices.

I don't think you crossed a line at all. Particularly the way you did it, without anger or emotion or implication of punishment, but simply "we don't do that here."

One of the master teachers I was assigned to during my student teaching handled most discipline this way in his third grade class, whenever he could. It was a wonderful way to do it, because it didn't tend to make kids act out in response, and the students picked up on it themselves; sometimes you would hear one student telling another, "we don't do that here."

What? You weren't cruel or angry or inappropriate. Good for you. I make a living telling other people's kids what to do, I see nothing wrong with it! ;D preschool teacher.

If my son was to do something like that when at school and I wasn't there, and you were, I'd WANT you to day something like that!

It takes a community. Thank you for being part of the community.

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