cleolinda

God, James Franco has the stonerest smile. Please welcome! Amy Adams and Jake Gyllenhaal, "who made out with my cohost. IN A MOVIE." I have to say, I'm not sure about big emeralds with a sparkly blue dress. Gyllenhaal urges us to see short films throughout the year, for they will inspire us! Lobbyists for the Seeing of Short Films Throughout the Year clap and cheer in the audience. I mean, I can't think who else. 

Documentary (Short Subject)
“Killing in the Name” Jed Rothstein
“Poster Girl” Sara Nesson and Mitchell W. Block
“Strangers No More” Karen Goodman and Kirk Simon
“Sun Come Up” Jennifer Redfearn and Tim Metzger
“The Warriors of Qiugang” Ruby Yang and Thomas Lennon

Winner: "Strangers No More." I feel really bad not giving equal speech-transcription time to everyone, but I'm having difficulty finging, y'all.

Short Film (Live Action)
“The Confession” Tanel Toom
“The Crush” Michael Creagh
“God of Love” Luke Matheny
“Na Wewe” Ivan Goldschmidt
“Wish 143” Ian Barnes and Samantha Waite

Winner: "God of Love." Luke Metheny is wearing his formal fro. Seriously, his hair has a diameter of at least eighteen inches, it's kind of astounding. Metheny thanks NYU, "the rest of the crew, which I'll thank on like the thank-you cam or something, and my mom, who did craft services on the film," (huge applause) "my dad, the great state of Delaware, and"--my transcription-fu is failing here--"the love of my life," who I think was also their composer.

Franco: "NYU, WHAT'S UP."

Oh God, they are editing Deathly Hallows into a musical. Is this leading into the "musical Twilight surprise"? Because I don't know that my embarrassment squick can handle this. Okay, you get points for "He Doesn't Own a Shirt," the new single by Edward Cullen. I will give you that.

Yeah. That. That was the "surprise" that the Twilight people kept hyping all week. And millions of teenage girls shake their fists at the heavens.

"One of the perks of being a host is wearing a dress like this!" And Hathaway does a little shimmy in her fringe-y gold dress. Hee. "Sorry, personal moment. One of the other perks is getting to breathe the same air as this next presenter!" And Franco INHAAAALES, as only a stoner can. I don't even know. It's Oprah! Oprah is here to tell us about important stories. Colin Firth gazes on with moist, concerned eyes.

RT @kitalita: RT @BrianDermody: "Everyone look under your seats. James Franco brought some pot for yooooooouuuu!"

Documentary (Feature)
“Exit through the Gift Shop” Banksy and Jaimie D'Cruz
“Gasland” Josh Fox and Trish Adlesic
“Inside Job” Charles Ferguson and Audrey Marrs
“Restrepo” Tim Hetherington and Sebastian Junger
“Waste Land” Lucy Walker and Angus Aynsley

Oh Jesus, this is gonna be g--Inside Job? Man. There is an entertainment opportunity that just went to waste. That said, my understanding is that this is a movie that really needs to be seen. "Forgive me, I must start by pointing out that three years after" the crash of the economy, "not one financial executive has gone to jail." (Righteous applause.) "Let the record show, I am not wearing jeans." What?