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Oscar liveblog #11
msauvage purple
And now... the games begin.

Here's Anne Hathaway in another dress, and it's... like.. midnight violet blue... vinyl... lamé. Or something. "Please welcome two-time award winner Hilary Swank! Woo!" Swank is in silver and five ostriches' worth of skirt. Please welcome! Kathryn Bigelow in long-sleeved shoulderless red (yes, somehow)! THAT'S RIGHT, WE GET A HOST TO PRESENT A PRESENTER TO PRESENT KATHRYN BIGELOW. RESPECT.

“Black Swan” Darren Aronofsky
“The Fighter” David O. Russell
“The King's Speech” Tom Hooper
“The Social Network” David Fincher
“True Grit” Joel Coen and Ethan Coen

Winner: TOM HOOPER. "OH SHIT!" I actually yelled this out loud, people."OH SHIT!" I don't care about your "triangle of man love," that is--just--you seem like a really nice guy, but--seriously? The visual direction was the one thing I complained about when I saw the movie! Which I really liked! But not the visual direction! And I know directors contribute more than that! But I have a hard time believing you had to do anything with these actors but set them down on the stage and let them go! I just--what! What is this! I really love this movie but I do not understand! Concludes Hooper, "And the moral of the story is: listen to your mother."

James Franco seems to be having trouble reading the teleprompter; he's making faces at it while struggling to announce Annette Bening, who is in a fantastically blinged-out (are we still allowed to use the word "bling"? Is that still young and hip?) black dress. There seems to be some sort of honorary business going on here with Francis Ford Coppola and Eli Wallach and someone else. Apparently we don't actually take up twenty minutes giving honorary Oscars out anymore? I'm sorry, they just gave an Oscar to someone other than David Fincher. The King's Speech was a movie essentially carried by Colin Firth and, to a lesser extent, his costars. The Social Network was a movie carried by David Fincher. I'm going to be here a while.

Please welcome! Jeff Bridges! "WOO!" from Anne Hathaway and lesser WOOs from the audience! Oh dear, we're doing the Personal Nominee Tongue Bath again this year. To save time, however, we are only having a single presenter bathe all five nominees, unlike in the past when we had a whole passel of people do it, and only the lead categories. So all five of these women are now getting personalized monologues on their awesomosity from The Dude. You could do worse.

RT @Fowler_IGN: Jeff Bridges is about to school James Franco on how to host shit stoned!

Hey, kids? Could we not retweet that with @jamesfranco in front? Especially my retweet of it? WE DO NOT CROSS THE STREAMS.

Actress in a Leading Role
Annette Bening in “The Kids Are All Right”
Nicole Kidman in “Rabbit Hole”
Jennifer Lawrence in “Winter's Bone”
Natalie Portman in “Black Swan”
Michelle Williams in “Blue Valentine”

Winner: Natalie Portman! In a raspberry purple color that I think is my favorite dress of hers this season! Huge cheers from the audience! Annette Bening looks genuinely happy for her, perhaps showing her true talent as a performer! Portman says she wishes that the award was that she would get to work with her fellow nominees, which is one of the best variations on "I'm just so honored to be with these women" I've ever heard. She rambles on moistly, as you do when you win Best Actress, and thanks her fiancé for giving her "the most important role of her life." Wow, she is still going. Seriously, I think she has thanked everyone she has ever met, some of them twice over.

Ladies and gentlemen, a special moment for Anne Hathaway! So special that she messes up! "Flub!" she announces! "Drink at home!" Please welcome! The amazing special moment of getting to introduce Sandra Bullock, who is wearing an amazing red dress! "Javier! Hola."

Actor in a Leading Role
Javier Bardem in “Biutiful”
Jeff Bridges in “True Grit”
Jesse Eisenberg in “The Social Network”
Colin Firth in “The King's Speech”
James Franco in “127 Hours”

She references the time he terrified "an entire nation with your haircut." Moving on: "Jeff. Dude. Didn't you win this last year? Isn't it enough?" And: "Jesse? I'm still waiting for you to accept my friend request." She is glad for Colin Firth that the Queen enjoyed The King's Speech, "since you plan on going home sometime?" (Loud whistle in the audience?) "James? James? Oh, you're in the back." Cut to James Franco grinning awkwardly, as you do, backstage. "You are the number one reason children get picked up late from school, because their mothers are watching you on General Hospital." Winner: Colin Firth, preventing civil unrest. "I have a feeling my career's just peaked. My deepest thanks to the Academy. I'm afraid I have to warn you that I'm experiencing stirrings... in the upper abdominals... that are threatening to form themselves into... dance moves... which... joyous as they may be... will become problematic if they reach my legs before I am able to get off stage." He gets very emotional when he gets to thanking David Seidler, which is very sweet. And he thanks Tom Ford for "a very big piece of this," I'm guessing from having done A Single Man with him? "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some... impulses... I have to attend to... backstage."

Here is Anne Hathaway in YET ANOTHER DRESS. Dark, sparkly lace sheath of some sort? "LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, STEVEN SPIELBERG!" Okay, awesomely: "The other nine [movies that do not win] will join The Grapes of Wrath, Citizen Kane, The Graduate, and Raging Bull." Very nice point. Meanwhile, I'm not sure a montage of the ten nominees should be set to the King's actual Speech, if you were trying to maintain any suspense at all. (SERIOUSLY, IS THIS THE ENTIRE SPEECH?)

Best Picture
“Black Swan” Mike Medavoy, Brian Oliver and Scott Franklin, Producers
“The Fighter” David Hoberman, Todd Lieberman and Mark Wahlberg, Producers
“Inception” Emma Thomas and Christopher Nolan, Producers
“The Kids Are All Right” Gary Gilbert, Jeffrey Levy-Hinte and Celine Rattray, Producers
“The King's Speech” Iain Canning, Emile Sherman and Gareth Unwin, Producers
“127 Hours” Christian Colson, Danny Boyle and John Smithson, Producers
“The Social Network” Scott Rudin, Dana Brunetti, Michael De Luca and Ceán Chaffin, Producers
“Toy Story 3” Darla K. Anderson, Producer
“True Grit” Scott Rudin, Ethan Coen and Joel Coen, Producers
“Winter's Bone" Anne Rosellini and Alix Madigan-Yorkin, Producers

Winner: The King's Speech. You know, as much as I liked this movie, I suddenly had this wild hope that Spielberg would open the envelope and be like, "Winter's Bone?!?!?!" Wow, are they actually playing off the producer of the Best Picture? Holy crap. The show only ran three hours and eight minutes, you'll live.

And then the fifth grade chorus from Staten Island comes out to sing "Over the Rainbow." Behind them, all the night's winners step out in front of an Emerald City backdrop. Well, I guess this is why they had to play the guy off stage. Why not? I believe that is Hathaway yelling, "Woo! We did it!" Thank you, go sleep it off, and good night!

@judyblume: Come on--it wasn't that bad. It's the Oscar show. What did you expect? And now can we please go to sleep?

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Im so happy The King's Speech got so much love tonight!!

The King's Speech

This brought a really big smile to my face. :)

That was...surreal. Weirdest Oscars ever? Maybe. I liked Natalie and Colin's speeches though.

I agree it was the most surreal. Not the worst however. That still goes to Rob Lowe and Snow White.

I loved the montage for Best Picture, even if it was basically like, These movies are fab, but it's all King's Speech all night. (I just have a thing for montages.)

Although I kind of hated them showing the TKS climax to those who haven't seen it, it was pretty cool. Like, "HEY, OTHER MOVIES, THIS MOVIE IS ABOUT TO PWN YOU."

Oh, Cleo, there you are. Thank God. You had us worried!

Tweet from Mrs. Firth: http://twitter.com/#!/liviafirth/status/42082274077978624 Aww.

I don't think I've ever seen an Oscars show this surreal in my entire life.

Eventually I decided to make some boozey hot chocolate because it just felt right. Alas, was not boozey enough.

It was a nice night, all in all!

And I really, really liked the way all the winners lined up at the end.

I loved The King's Speech and was happy it won most everything. But I was really disappointed they basically spoiled the end of the movie and trivialized the speech. I mean, come on, The Social Network is not comparable to war. None of them are, they're just movies. I get, I guess, why they did it, but I found it to be in poor taste.

You have a point.

Although I confess I got a chuckle out of the shot of Natalie Portman's crazed red eyes as Firth's voice was asking everyone to keep calm.

Thank god you did this. I would have been forced to watch this fiasco otherwise.

*am bitter about Inception and I See the Light*

I had the benefit of alcohol and this year's show was still almost unwatchable. I still think Hugh Jackman and the Craigslist Dancers were the best I can remember.

I'll join you in being unhappy about Tom Hooper winning Best Director. Out of the nominees, David Fincher or Darren Aronofsky should have won. But I'm still pissed that Christopher Nolan didn't even get NOMINATED, and I really think he was the Best Director this year.

2nd this. Its making me hate on Tom Hooper and TKS, and I actually did like the movie and loved Colin Firth, but I tend to h8 on things that are overrated.

And thank YOU! Without you and the Monkey See livebloggers (...and Twitter) to make this bearable I would probably have given up and gone to bed early.

The show had a few hits, but was mostly misses for me. Your liveblog was great, as always.

The credits for the broadcast included one for "James Franco's Jewelry."

I am pretty sure this is the oddest Oscar broadcast I've seen.

Excuse you, I believe that's "Mr. Franco".

It was super bizarre. I'm still trying to decide how I feel about that autotune montage. Shaking my head at that one right now...

Wait, that seriously was the king's speech? I feel so violated. Now I'm going to Netflix everything else first.

I am pretty sure that was literally the entire speech from the end of the movie, IIRC.

Whilst I would have been more than happy for Aronofsky or Fincher to win (and if I'd seen the other Director nominees, probably them too) I'm glad The King's Speech got it. Black Swan and Social Network had stunning direction, but on this one occasion my concern is for my own country's industry and it's politically significant* for King's Speech to have landed the big awards. So from a purely selfish we-need-to-show-how-important-the-UK-Film-Council-is point of view, I'm more than happy. The King's Speech winning shows why it's important for films like The King's Speech to be made.

I will give you that--I know what a terrible situation the funding's in at the moment.

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SO MUCH agree. They even played the music from Tangled to go to commercial!