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Occupation: Girl

Please close the door and switch on the fun without fail.

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Harry Potter is the Biggest Worldwide Debut Ever with $476M. That is to say, nearly half a billion dollars, blowing through the Eclipse midnight record, the New Moon opening day record, and the Dark Knight weekend record. From what I've seen of Comments on the Interwebs, Twilight fans and Batman fans are united in shouting YEAH WELL WAIT TILL OUR LAST MOVIE COMES OUT, and then they realize they're on the same side and run away to wash that icky fanboy/girl off. Whatever helps you sleep at night, kids.

Guillermo Del Toro and Emma Watson for Beauty and the Beast?; David Yates reveals his next project PP (post-Potter) (whoa, The Stand?); How Harry Potter Changed Publishing (three words: midnight release parties); 10 great, and 10 no-so-great, things about Harry Potter. And here's our discussion post, with a--well, not a defense, but an alternate take on the epilogue. Also:

@bestforfilm: We're opening a bar called Harry Shotters. Drinks include Margaritaskeeters, Cedric Daquiris, Mojicho Changs... #harrypotterdrinks

Concoctions include Pinot Gringotts, Episkey Sours, Mudbloody Marys, Blast Ended Skrewtdriver, Hex on the Beach, Ginny and Tonic, Ron and Coke, Creme De Menter, and my favorite, Madame Hooch.

Since y'all have waited ever so patiently, let's skip straight to TheOneRing.net Exclusive: Behold! Thorin Oakenshield and Orcrist! 

I'm still learning to live with the unibrow. Actually, it's not so much the unibrow as the somewhat fake-looking excess of forehead above it, I think.

WB has officially released the Teaser Trailer for The Dark Knight Rises; Nerd Watch: 'The Dark Knight' [fan-made] Trilogy Poster is Pretty Badass.

Nine New Looks at 'The Amazing Spider-Man.'

'Captain America: The First Avenger' will open at Comic-Con; Olly Moss Creates World War 2 Propaganda Posters for 'Captain America'; Eight New Captain America TV Spots; The real reason Captain America doesn't punch Hitler in his new movie. I'm still not sure if I care about this, although it has been pointed out that both Hugo Weaving and Richard Dwarfitage Armitage are in it. Hm.

Universal Won't Scale Stephen King's 'The Dark Tower;' Studio Declines To Make Ambitious Trilogy And TV Series. But have you talked to David Yates...?


@chris_ryall: "Twilight fans don't really seem to get the humor of our Sparkles for Blood promotion at #SDCC." Yeah, they don't, and I kind of don't blame them. It's funny in terms of everyone else getting to laugh at Twilight fandom, but in terms of actually getting those fans to turn in their books to try your product? It's a complete failure, yeah. You don't actually want those fans to give you their books; you just want to mock them so everyone else will remember how cool you are and buy your books. I mean, do what you want, but be honest about what you're doing.

Also, before everyone emails it to me: Lasers reveal the scientific basis for sparkly vampires. 

@Twilight: The #BreakingDawnPart1 #ComicCon panel line has started! These fans are getting ready for Thursday! http://twitpic.com/5saptb 

@cleolinda: I am being told that they've been lined up since Saturday. Jesus take the wheel.

@JessOfRVA: @cleolinda What's amazing is that the gold circle seaters will be getting in ahead of them anyway.

I am super sad right now. Like, for everyone.

Kevin Costner in talks for sadistic baddie in Quentin Tarantino's Django Unchained; Kevin Costner may torture slaves for Quentin Tarantino. This is gonna end well.

Posters for Milady and Buckingham from The Three Musketeers are here. 

New Look at Karl Urban as Judge Dredd.

@cleolinda: We sure that's not just a picture from the first movie? RT: @STYDNews First Look at Beckinsale in Underworld: Awakening

IT'S ALL TRAILERS ALL THE TIME! The Trailer for Martin Scorsese's Hugo (Cabret); The Trailer for The Thing (prequel) Online!; First Trailer for 'John Carter' (of Mars) Arrives; 'The Howling: Reborn' Trailer Hits, Has the Werewolf Classic Been Done Justice?; Here's a new international red band trailer for Conan the Barbarian; Aardman’s Claymation Takes to the High Seas in Trailer for ‘The Pirates! Band of Misfits.’

Tom Cruise is Jack Reacher, Sean Bean Joins 'Snow White,' and Rhys Ifans is Tapped for 'Bond 23.

Updates on The Jetsons & Zack Snyder's The Illustrated Man.

Kristin Scott-Thomas shines (for a change, eh?) in the lovely Sarah's Key.

Will Harrison Ford Return For New 'Blade Runner' Films? D: D: D:

Jaume Collet-Serra in Talks to Direct Akira. Could you maybe just... try to get some Asian, not-Keanu-Reeves-aged actors? I mean, just try? Maybe? Seriously, go talk to George Takei, he can help you with this. 

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Yay! Linkspam FTW!

Oh, and that is one Klingon-like dwarf.

That is it! I have been trying to figure out what he reminded me of for a while now. Thank you.

I'm wondering how many times I'm going to see Thormitage pop up on my f-list in the next day or two. I'm thinking 20 is a conservative estimate. :-) I'm still trying to figure out the massive Armitage love. Yeah, he's cute and all, but cute enough to inspire shrieking fangirl armies? I just don't see it.

Matthew Macfadyen, now . . .

If you haven't, go watch him in North and South. That's what made me fall in love with him.

You know what's disturbing about the Thorin Oakenshield pic? It's that he looks like he's part Klingon and I don't know if it's intentional or not.

I'm still not sure if I care about this, although it has been pointed out that both Hugo Weaving and Richard Dwarfitage Armitage are in it. Hm. My feelings exactly. Every time I see a Captain America trailer I think "needs moar Richard Armitage."

honestly it is getting annoying.

OH HERE IS STEVE ROGERS' HETEROSEXUAL LOVE INTEREST since Tony Stark hasn't been born yet and so why are we even spending time on her. Meanwhile, RICHARD ARMITAGE IS STANDING IN THE CORNER HOLDING A LIGHTER. LIKE A BOSS.

that is most of what I remember from the trailer. And Stanley Tucci's hair.

Yeah, idk, I don't think the power of all the allowances combined can top that total for Twilight. Batman, on the other hand... Hm.

I think Batman has a shot at reclaiming the title, but it also isn't as kid-friendly. I mean, this DH movie was completely traumatic and I've heard of kids having to leave, but people at least THINK it's kid-friendly, as opposed to a teaser where Gordon lies curled up in a hospital bed all sad about how Batman needs to come back. Also: Bane.

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Yeah... people keep complaining that it's not in the books, but I was like... dude, it totally is. I read that the first time and I was like, wait? seriously? what? This was totally their summer of love, wasn't it?

If she'd come out and said he was gay after HBP, okay, that's one thing. After DH? I was only surprised that she actually announced it, not that he was.

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I think I am way too focused on the swords in The Hobbit. I am pretty much dying to see them all. I don't care about most of the actors except Aidan Turner and Martin Freeman... and Benedict Cumberbatch, okay, but THE SWORDS. One of my favorite parts of the book and the original animated film. :D

So um, what I mean to say is, ORCRIST. SQUEE.

I KNOOOOOOW. I was obsessed with the cartoon as a child. And I own a replica of Anduril, so yes: swords.

Please, please tell me that the people lining up for the Twilight panel ALMOST A WEEK EARLY is just a Twihard thing. Because if it is, I am royally screwed for getting in to anything. Some of us have to WORK this week before Thursday.

Also, how the hell are those people getting their badges?

Yeah, it's a Twihard thing. I mean, I'm sure people line up early, but THAT early is a Twihard thing.

Ohh, I made the mistake of clicking on the Sparkles for Blood link and then reading the comments. *facepalm* Twi-hards just baffle me. It's kind of a douchey PR move, but if I were going to SDCC, I'd totally jack my sister's books for trade.

David Yates reveals his next project PP (post-Potter) (whoa, The Stand?)

Oh please god please god please god make this movie(s) and do not screw it up pleeeeeeeeeeease.

I would actually be really interested to see what he does with it, based on the general bleakness of the last two HP movies. My God, if nothing else, they were beautifully photographed.

Camera-phoned Avengers trailer, the post-credits scene for Captain America, surprisingly enough. If we live long enough, we're going to see the credits half-way into the movie.

Hugo can do no wrong, but I'm still not worked up about this flick.

So the people in that line are going to be sitting there until Thursday? You'd think they might have brought a chair or something. And that security guard doesn't look too thrilled about guarding the front of that line.

Not to mention tents, sleeping bags, stoves... (Are they paying for a room while they camp out there? Egad!)

Huh the sparkles for blood promotion is kind of an interesting idea. I mean the execution is definitely douchey and to be honest I don't like 30 Days of Night any better then I like Twilight (It takes the Vampire mythology to far in the other direction for my taste making them little more then super competent zombies). On the other hand I do like the idea of giving people who read Twilight access to other options. Hell they could even end up liking both.

Thanks for covering the Underworld stuff I probably wouldn't track it down on my own but I do have a disgusting soft spot for that entire franchise. The lack of Scott Speedman is starting to become a little worrisome though.

Well, and as the Lexicon girl points out, David Slade directed both the Eclipse and the 30 Days of Night movies. They could have gone after Twilight fans from that inclusive angle, rather than trying to get them to give up their books (which they know full well no Twilight fan would do).

SO EXCITED about the John Carter movie. Anyone else read those books?

I'm reading it right now. I am SO glad they decided to keep the canon warrior/barbarian outfit.

I am envisioning a series of vampire fiction one-upmanship trade-ins, in which Charlie Huston offers copies of Joe Pitt novels in return for 30 Days of Night and so on.

Oooh, I never would have though of A) putting Emma Watson in a Beauty & the Beast movie, or B) of Del Toro directing, but Oh Gods Yes! That sounds amazing. I can so see her in one of his trippy surreal onscreen worlds.

I know! I thought I was sick of "Beauty & the Beast" but I'd totally see this winning combination.